两天的非暴力冲突解决工作坊结束之后,JIM&JORI引用的几个典故让我对NVC的理解又进了一层。其中:
1)Dan Gilbert的Hand Model,让我们更好的理解了潜意识和意识,身体之间的联系;
2)On Children-Kahlil Gibran,一开始没意识到是谁,直到度娘翻成纪伯伦才恍然大悟,这位美籍黎巴嫩阿拉伯诗人、作家、画家还写下过这么意味深远的片段。 (Kahlil Gibran 1883-1931)
纪伯伦像 纪伯伦绘《母亲》我也找到下面的版本供大家赏析:
孩子-纪伯伦
你的儿女并不是你的儿女
他们是生命自身憧憬的儿女
他们借助你来到这世界,却非自你而来
并且,尽管他们在你身旁,却并不属于你
你可以给予他们的是你的爱,却不是你的思想
因为他们有自己的思想
你可以庇护的是他们的身体,却不是他们的灵魂
因为他们的灵魂栖息于明日
那是你做梦也无法到达的地方
你可以拼尽力气变得和他们一样
却不可以让他们变得和你一样
因为生命不会后退,也不会逗留在昨日
你是弓,儿女是从你那射出的
朝气蓬勃的箭
弓箭手望着无尽的前路上那箭靶
他用尽力气将你拉开,
使他的箭可以射得又快又远
怀着愉快的心情在弓箭手的手中弯曲吧
因为他爱这飞翔着的箭
也爱那无比稳定的弓。”
到这里,相信大家也理解纪伯伦这弓与箭的由来。
这里讲了父母与孩子之间的关系,也适用在希望学生出成绩的教师,希望团队出结果的领导者,希望参与者出成果的引导者和教练,希望客户有成绩的顾问。。。
我们的努力该适时的止于何处?
如何让干预是助力而非是限制因素?
如何让我们的支持变成是催化剂而非是结果本身?
我们的努力像箭一样通过孩子,学生,团队,参与者,客户飞向远方,你会怎么做呢?
期待27-28的北京工作坊有更多的发现。
分享中借用了以下来源的译文和图片,非常感谢。如有建议,欢迎联系我。
http://sanwen.net/a/xbbkroo.html
http://www.joyen.net/article/listen/2/201007/3023.html
https://sanwen8.cn/p/7a5zJdr.html
附上原文:
On Children-Kahlil Gibran
Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.
You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them,
but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
You are the bows from which your children
as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,
and He bends you with His might
that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies,
so He loves also the bow that is stable.
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