今天是大师游戏第90天星期一，继续读《Grace and Grit》，今天最主要的学习是原谅。
The fundamental mood of the ego: never forgive, never forget
ego是小我的意思，小我的基础情绪是不忘记不原谅。
What the ego doesn't try is forgiveness, because that would undermine its very existence. To forgive others for insults, real or imagined, is to weaken the boundary
between self and other, to dissolve the sense of separation between subject and object. And thus, with forgiveness, awareness tends to let go of the ego and its insults, and revert instead to the Witness, the Self, which views both subject and
object equally. And thus, according
to the Course, forgiveness is the way I
let go of my self and remember my
Self.
为什么小我不肯原谅呢？因为那会威胁他的存在，因为原谅会让小我消失。小我消失之后，小我背后真实的自我/观察者就会出现～
My personal theory about this is that you don't have to make an effort to change or stop a certain behavior or thought you don't like.
In fact, the effort gets in the way. The important thing is to see it clearly, to observe all its aspects, to just witness it, and every time it arises you see it, it doesn't catch you by surprise.Then I think there's some kind of mysterious something, you could call it our evolutionary impulse to grow toward our fullest potential, toward God, or whatever,
but once you've cultivated awareness of the problem or defect or hangup, this mysterious something then seems able to keep us on course, to correct the defect.
当观察者出现时，你就可以看见你的情绪和感受，没有评判和抗拒，只是清晰地看着它们。
当你停止思考和评判，中正平和地观察它们时，神奇的事情就会发生～
Learning to focus more on **how we say something, not just the content. **Often each of us feels totally justified or right about the
content, but we both say this "truth" in an unkind or angry or defensive or provocative way. And then we can't understand why the other reacts to the twist in the comment, not thecontent. The one biggest insight for
me is understanding how our defensive styles interact with each other to set up a negative, downward spiral of reaction.
当我们沟通时，其实沟通的内容并不重要，重要的是我们是如何沟通的？我们是带着爱和理解去沟通还是带着指责和抱怨去沟通，爱和理解会产生爱和理解，而指责和抱怨会产生更多的指责和抱怨。
"Practice the wound of love," he says, you can't help but be wounded, just notice it, don't contract, and continue to love. "If you apre merely hurt, you will still know the
need for love, and you will still know the need to love."
当我们带着爱和理解和他人相处时，不可避免地会受到伤害，看见这些伤害，原谅伤害我们的人，然后继续去爱～
这并不容易，需要一遍又一遍地练习，Practice the wound of love.
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