A few days ago, I called my girlfriend but she didn’t answer the phone before the waiting sounds stopped. I punched her number again and again but she never answered. And then I changed to WeChat her by the voice message but the same thing happened. My anger accumulated and I dialed her again and again. To be honest, I had nothing important to talk with her. I just wanted to say hi. I was controlled by the Judger pattern and I blamed her while I was calling her. Was she deaf or did she deliberately ignored my calling? Of course it wasn’t.
I was out of consciousness. What I should do is to wait for her or call her latter but my aim at that moment was only to make her answer my phone immediately. If I could use my Learner pattern, I wouldn’t be so stubborn.
I recalled when I was stuck on the way home, I would blame that there must be some stupid guy drove his car on the wrong way and I would blame him, this fabricated guy by me, all the way and imagined what stupid things he had did. And the more I imagined, the more angry I would be. But the fact was that I didn’t know what really happened. I was annoyed by my imaginary accident. How pathetic.
Such things happen to me every day and I’m often annoyed by such things. After reading the book Change Your Questions, Change Your Life, I learned I have to use Learner questions to change such situations.
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