In my memory, I was brought up by a family where being obedient is praised. My mother love docile child and they both gave me impressing positive feedbacks when I lived up to their expectations in studies and daily life.
As an innocent child, unconsciously and gradually I formed the habit of respecting family members` and later intimates` viewpoints, considering their advices as beneficial, or at least, with good intention. Lacking individual thinking practices, I was more of a follower. In other words, I often sought outside credible insights and emotional support when I was hesitating in diagnosing a situation or choosing a path for myself, the puzzles ranging from whether to start a relationship with a lovable boy to which subject I should pursue in my university.
Instead of reading what was deep in my soul and caring more about what was in that cute boy`s mind, I expressed my delight to an “intimate” friend and then took her suspicious comments as my inner butterflies. I regretted for the thoughtless adoption of her judgement.
I picked up my university major based on quite peripheral factors, a roommate`s recommendation of a moneyed occupation and an older uncle`s vivid description of two girls and twenty-eight boys in an engineering class (that was astonishing), unbalancing rather than exciting to me now. Maybe it was owing to laziness or ignorance that I had never researched other intriguing subjects that were more of my appetite such as design and advertisement. In addition, honestly in that age, I was hoping more for a romantic relationship rather than a serious maturing period.
As illustrated inHow to view the unpredictable future, an earlier resolution would bring its long-term impact on later life. My inaction took me to places I would rather bypass.
I had not realized the mistakes above until a similar error made me a totally obvious idiot. I broke another relationship unmindfully again. Isn`t apparent that if not enough reflections are made, you will jump into comparable traps along your path.
The right lessons should be summed up and learned.
Looking back, I was like a tiny ship without a sail swung by wild storm. Seemingly I knew a rough destination, however a gossip beside my ear could alter that picture. I was either too sensitive or too apathetic to additional information.
What I acquire from my past debacle is that anyone around you should beno more than your consultant. Your empire has only one king, and being a puppet means delivering the supreme power to others, whether your kindhearted family members or your considerate best friends. It is better to keep in mind that any fame and blame from your each strategy is on you. More importantly, however close you are to them, a compass exclusively available to you produces lopsided advantage, your inner whispers, of which the explanation is just open to you. You should never blind yourself to this.
Here is a reminder.
The temporary ease of being dependent is tempting, but constant practice to be a better chief commander in your own life journey will bring lasting peace. Sharp your thoughts to turn others your helper, not hinders.
Only when you put on a sail for your ship, acquire the skill and knowledge of piloting, can you hopefully expect a promising prospect to arrive at your dream land.
Good luck!
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