让我却步的并不是痛苦，而是时间
以它悲哀的前兆和气味，
它的鲜花和回响，它的河流和罪错。
即使是现在，虽然没有未来，
我都要用未来时态向自己说谎。当我的头发
逐渐稀疏，我开始收集梳子。当闹钟鸣响，我悲叹。
沉落的世界从绝望中寻找乐趣
因为痛苦意味着独处，
而我的痛苦来源于变化带来的
种种事端就像我无法搞定的乐谱，
就像我在拆除死亡的种种发明。
我曾经建造城堡，现在我做家庭杂务。
为了消磨时间我整理我的东西。
为了能够入睡我背诵国王的名字。
作者 / [美国] 乔书亚·爱德华斯
翻译 / 光诸
Decline
It is not pain that holds me back, but time
With its sad prefigurations and smell,
Its flowers and echoes, rivers and crime.
Even now, without a future, I tell
Myself lies in future tense. As my hair
Thins, I collect combs. When clocks chime, I groan.
The falling world finds pleasure in despair
Because to suffer means to be alone,
And I suffer through all the accidents
Of change as though I were settling a score,
As if to disinvent what death invents.
I once built a castle, now I do chores.
To pass the time I rearrange my things.
To fall asleep I recite names of kings.
JOSHUA EDWARDS
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