How to Be a Person in the World在世如何为人

How to Be a Person in the World, 作者 Heather Havrilesky。本书通过解读各种家长里短的读者来信，从接地气的日常故事中先啪啪啪打你脸，接着再讲述一个不一样的人生大道理，用别样鸡汤温暖你心。《卫报》评论：“ Heather Havrilesky 不仅仅是一位优秀的作家，而且还是有史以来最了不得的知心大姐姐，就连那些平常对知心姐姐们不屑一顾的人都会忍不住地去读她的书。她深谙人心，她的话常常能令你醍醐灌顶。”

节目简介

新一代知心姐姐如何回信？回信套路怎么搞？总觉得自己独一无二，找不到神交好友怎么办？如何让爆燥不堪的自己变得内心平静？闺蜜和自己的前男友搞在了一起，到底怎么办？替你读书，塔主替你读 How to Be a Person in the World，世界上的每一个角落都坐落着相同的烦恼，我们不过是穿着不同的衣服，说着不同的语言，吃着不同的食物，但却有着同样问题的一群人罢了。

语言点

[ 01'08" ] Ask Polly

[ 01'10" ] Heather Havrilesky

专业网络写手

[ 01'29" ] Dear Abby栏目名

50年代

第一封信[ 03'28" ] Making Friends (out of nothing at all)

从零开始交朋友

[ 03'36" ] Out of nothing at all (两个人一点关系都没有)

[ 04'12" ] Over time and with little fanfare (号角齐鸣炫耀)

[ 04'42" ] My connection to a person grows until we are bonded 紧密in that mysterious way people bond. (我必须在跟别人建立那一点点神秘的纽带的时候，和他们的关系才真正变的亲密。)

[ 04'49" ] After all, without fail, as soon as something begins to slowly take shape, one of us moves away, and all that potential energy goes “poof”.

[ 05'45" ] Go poof (一下子消失不见)

[ 06'50" ] For someone who’s not great at 不擅长small talk (小对话), who can never quite hit that lowest common denominator (公分母) of casual chattiness, who can never quite manage to burble (喋喋不休) happily about the weather and the news and those cute shoes and the new restaurant down the block , making brand new friends sounds about as appealing (有吸引力的) as a trip to the podiatrists (足科医生).

[ 07'47" ] Hit the lower common denominator of casual chattiness (找到最容易的共同点)

[ 10'00" ] Even though I was a socially paralyzed shut-in (社交瘫痪的内向者), I realize now that my standards were also way too fucking high. No one was smart enough or interesting enough for me. No one was perfectly equipped to understand every inch of my tortured soul.

[ 11'35" ] In order to make very close friends in a natural, organic way, you have to cast a wide net (广撒网) and be accepting 接受别人and give it time.

[ 15'18" ] You are still choosing him over her.重色轻友

[ 16'10" ] Imagine that the two people you’ve loved and trusted the most in the world are now aligning (与...团结一致) themselves and discussing you thoroughly and then leaving you out of all of it and moving forward without you.

[ 17'25" ] They want each other, not you. You’re not important anymore. You don’t matter. They made their choice. They win and you lose.

[ 18'13" ] Painting someone as weak or pathetic (可悲的) for feeling hurt or overwhelmed or heartbroken is inexcusable (无法容忍的).

[ 19'02" ] It’s antihuman. The world is filled with people who think feeling less, being indifferent (冷漠的), makes you strong. Don’t believe that.

[ 19'30" ] Be one of the smart, thoughtful (体贴的) people who stands up for sensitive people.

[ 19'44" ]When you stand up for (为…发声) sensitive, hurt people, you’re also standing up for vulnerability (脆弱) and authenticity (真诚) and true love.

[ 22'49" ] Tough love

[ 22'59" ] Polly

“当你的世界里开始接受别人的存在，开始有别人的声音时，世界的信息量就会变得非常之大，变得非常之多彩，学会聆听之后，周围的每个人都变成了好有趣的人。其实不是他们无趣，只是我们没有发现而已。”