头号问题

Who am I?

This is one of the three questions that our security guard love to throw on your face.

“Who are you” “where you come from” and “where are you going”.

I always presume I have the answer, of course I know, I am 30 yrs old for now,

for sure I am capable of answering or at least enough to get me through the gates one after another.

But do I really know, do I really have my life figured? Am I happy with the answer, is it self-given or filled in by others’ expectation.

For answering “who am I”, I have a full A4 page listed with “identities” that I could think of describe someone like me in a few minutes. But I feel there’s far more than those words.

Have I lived, have I truly lived?

When is the last time I feel alive, acknowledge my existence and being aware of my being.

Am I the person I thought I am, do I have a pattern, do I grow a habit, do I own a tag to be grouped into a certain type.

yes, when we talk to someone, or doing some mental quiz, it always shown that we belong to certain type. With this obvious syndromes, we can convince ourselves that we are lions or rabbits, extroverts, sensors, feelers, and perceivers.

But none of those shows that we’re might also be confused, that we're angry and sad, that we're scared and lost.

That we could be a runner, a quitter at some point. But we can also be a fighter, a leader at some other times.

We could be irresponsible and reckless, but we can also be in charge and thoughtful.

We could be childish and naive, but we can also be creative and empathetic.

We could be a good observer but we can also be a blind moron sometimes.

We could be easy to persuaded but we can also be quite determined.

We could be selfish but we can also care about others.

We could be decent and we can also be a beast.

So please tell me, tell me who am I,

make me see myself through your eyes.