读《月亮与六便士》

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追逐梦想就是追逐自己的厄运，在满地都是六便士的街上，他抬起头看到了月光。

断断续续用了一个月的时间，终于读完了《月亮与六便士》The Moon and Sixpence，虽然提前知道这是一本关于追求梦想的故事，可是没想到过程如此艰辛。

男主人公Charles Strickland，一位证券从业者，在伦敦过着富足的生活，漂亮贤惠的妻子，乖巧懂事的儿女陪伴左右。在四十岁某一天忽然忍受不了自己的生活，抛妻弃子，留下一封简单的信，孑然一身、毫无牵挂地跑去了巴黎。

他随身没有什么财产，住在巴黎最差街道上最差的旅店。为了什么？为了追求梦想—画画，完全从零开始，义无反顾地开始了追梦。不在乎别人怎么想、怎么看，不在乎自己是否能达到功成名就，只因为喜欢，就足够了。

由于本身尚无名气、人品不好以及自身的傲气，画的画很难卖出去，没有经济来源，身上衣裳、口中食都成问题，幸好有画家Dirk Stroeve丝毫不在意被三番五次地冷嘲热讽，多次热心相助，主人公依靠救济维持着活着。

在Charles Strickland病入膏肓的时候，Dirk Stroeve不顾妻子的强烈反对，坚持把Strickland接到自己家细心照料，Strickland才得以康复。

然而他却恩将仇报夺走了Dirk至爱的妻子的心，且毫不珍惜，Dirk的妻子自杀身亡，Dirk家破人亡，孤身一人回到故乡， Strickland丝毫没有罪恶感，认为此事与己无关。

我们的主人公继续在追梦，到处找寻灵感，最后辗转来到他梦想的地方，离天堂最近的地方，位于南太平洋的塔希提岛。为了生活，工作两三个月买点东西就返回丛林中画画，饥饿难耐，再走出丛林工作，往返于现实与梦想之间。

为了生活，与一位当地姑娘Tiare结婚，过了一段幸福的日子，可以衣食无忧，又可以隐居于大自然中，全心全意专注于画画这一件事。直到后来身患麻风病，被当地人隔离，依然坚持画画。

最后失明，在居住房屋墙壁画出了这辈子最满意的作品，完成一幅旷世之作，毫无遗憾告别人世。妻子遵从他的遗言，将这幅骇世之作焚烧殆尽。

Strickland多次将画赠予他人，声称“It means nothing to you now, but it may be that one day you will be glad to have it."可见Strickland仿佛已经预见到自己终将成名，而他并不在乎这些。生前穷困潦倒，死后流芳百世，看来也是艺术界见怪不怪的事情。

虽然不理解主人公的一些行事作风，但是他追求梦想的执着让人十分敬佩。看完这部小说后久久不能平静，四十岁追求梦想都不晚，看来我还有时间

这部小说还让人感到些许压抑，其一是，因为男主人公为了追求梦想，过着衣不蔽体、食不果腹的生活；其二是，因为文章所揭露的人性的自私、丑陋；其三是文章中随处可见的对于女性一些偏激的观点，让人感到十分不舒服。

文章中所出现的一些经典语录，值得借鉴，摘抄下来比较喜欢的语段，待日后学习参考。

1. 成功与否？世人评价，幸福与否？冷暖自知，子非鱼，又安知鱼之乐？

“Is to do what you most want, to live under the conditions that please you, in peace with yourself, to make a hash of life; and is it success to be an eminent surgeon with ten thousand a year and a beautiful wife? I suppose it depends on what meaning you attach to life, the claim which you acknowledge to society, and the claim of the individual.”

（做自己最想做的事，生活在自己喜爱的环境里，淡薄宁静、与世无争，就是糟蹋自己吗？难道成为一名收入过万，有一位漂亮妻子的外科医生就算是成功了吗？我想，这一切都取决于一个人如何看待生活的意义，以及你对社会和个人的定义。）

2. 一颗不甘平凡的心

“I felt in such an existence, the share of the great majority, something amiss. I recognised its social values, I saw its ordered happiness, but a fever in my blood asked for a wilder course. There seemed to me something alarming in such easy delights. In my heart was a desire to live more dangerously. I was not unprepared for jagged rocks and treacherous shoals if I could only have change—change and the excitement of the unforeseen.”

（我总觉得大多数人这样度过一生好像欠缺点什么。我承认这种生活的社会价值，我也看到了它的井然有序的幸福，但是我的血液里却有一种强烈的愿望，渴望一种更狂放不羁的旅途。我的心渴望一种更加惊险的生活。只要生活中还能有变迁—以及不可知的刺激，我愿意踏上怪石嶙峋的山崖，奔赴暗礁满布的海滩。）

3.用尽全身力气过好平凡的一生

“The world is hard and cruel. We are here none knows why, and we go none knows whither. We must be very humble. We must see the beauty of quietness. We must go through life so inconspicuously that Fate does not notice us. And let us seek the love of simple, ignorant people. Their ignorance is better than all our knowledge. Let us be silent, content in our little corner, meek and gentle like them. That is the wisdom of life."

（人生充满了艰辛和残酷。我们不知为何存在，也不知要往何去。我们必须谦卑，体会平凡之美。我们无声无息地过着平凡的一生，以使命运把我忘怀。让我们去探险平凡无知的人的生活乐趣吧。他们的无知胜过我们的博学。让我们保持着沉默，满足于自己的小天地，像他们一样驯顺温和。这就是人生的智慧。）

4.活在当下

“I don't think of the past. The only thing that matters is the everlasting present."

（我不会去想过去的事情，我唯一在乎的是永恒的此时此刻。）

5.注孤生？No

“Each one of us is alone in the world. He is shut in a tower of brass, and can communicate with his fellows only by signs, and the signs have no common value, so that their sense is vague and uncertain. We seek pitifully to convey to others the treasures of our heart, but they have not the power to accept them, and so we go lonely, side by side but not together, unable to know our fellows and unknown by them. ”

（我们每个人生在世界上都是孤独的。每个人都被囚禁在一座铁塔里，只能靠一些符号同别人传达自己的思想；而这些符号并没有共同的价值，因此它们的意义是模糊的、不确定的。我们非常可怜地想把自己心中的财富传送给别人，但是他们却没有接受这些财富的能力。因此我们只能孤独地行走，尽管身体互相依傍却并不在一起，既不了解别人也不能为别人所了解。）

6.天使还是恶魔？Both

“I had not yet learnt how contradictory is human nature; I did not know how much pose there is in the sincere, how much baseness in the noble, nor how much goodness in the reprobate.Now I am well aware that pettiness and grandeur, malice and charity, hatred and love, can find place side by side in the same human heart.”

（我当时还不了解人性多么矛盾，我不知道真挚中含有多少做作，高尚中蕴藏着多少卑鄙，或者，邪恶里中有多少美德。现在我意识到卑鄙与伟大、恶毒与善良、仇恨与热爱，是可以互不排斥地并存在同一颗心里的。）

7. 我们是“幸福快乐”的一家人？

“I pictured their lives, troubled by no untoward adventure, honest, decent, and, by reason of those two upstanding, pleasant children, so obviously destined to carry on the normal traditions of their race and station, not without significance. They would grow old insensibly; they would see their son and daughter come to years of reason, marry in due course—the one a pretty girl, future mother of healthy children; the other a handsome, manly fellow, obviously a soldier; and at last, prosperous in their dignified retirement, beloved by their descendants, after a happy, not unuseful life, in the fullness of their age they would sink into the grave. That must be the story of innumerable couples, and the pattern of life it offers has a homely grace.”

（我想象着这一对夫妻的生活，不受任何灾殃祸变的干扰，诚实、体面，两个孩子更是规矩可 爱，肯定会继承和发扬这一家人的地位和传统。在不知不觉间，他们俩的年纪越来越老，儿女却逐渐长大成人，到了一定的年龄，就会结婚成家—这个美丽的姑娘，将来还会成为健康孩子的母亲；另一个则是仪表堂堂的男子汉，显然会成为一名军人。最后这一对夫妻告老引退，受到子孙敬爱，过着富足、体面的晚 年，未曾虚度，直到年寿已高，才告别了人世。这一定是世间无数对夫妻的生活写照，这种生活模式给人一种天伦之美。）

8.如何更好的了解一个男人？住一起！

“You can never tell what a man is like till you live with him.”

（直到你和一个男人住在一起，你才知道他是什么样子。）

9.感情只为性需要？

“I don't want love. I haven't time for it. It's weakness. I am a man, and sometimes I want a woman. When I've satisfied my passion I'm ready for other things.”

（我不需要爱情。我没有时间谈恋爱。这是人性的弱点。我是个男人，有时候我需要一个女性。但是一旦我的情欲得到了满足，我就准备做别的事了。）

10.相信爱情也️错？赤裸裸的歧视女性！

“Because women can do nothing except love, they've given it a ridiculous importance.They want to persuade us that it's the whole of life. It's an insignificant part. I know lust. That's normal and healthy. Love is a disease. Women are the instruments of my pleasure; I have no patience with their claim to be helpmates, partners, companions."

（因为女人除了谈情说爱不会干别的，所以她们把爱情看得非常重要，简直到了可笑的地步。她们还想说服我们，叫我们也相信人的全部生活就是爱情。实际上爱情是生活中无足轻重的一部分。我只懂得情欲。这是正常的，健康的。爱情是一种疾病。女人是我享乐的工具，我非常讨厌她们提出伴侣各种要求。）

11.爱情与自由不可兼得？生命诚宝贵，爱情价更高；若为自由故，二者皆可抛？哪里有绝对的自由？！再次赤裸裸的歧视女性！

“When a woman loves you she's not satisfied until she possesses your soul. Because she's weak, she has a rage for domination, and nothing less will satisfy her. She has a small mind, and she resents the abstract which she is unable to grasp. She is occupied with material things, and she is jealous of the ideal. The soul of man wanders through the uttermost regions of the universe, and she seeks to imprison it in the circle of her account-book. Do you remember my wife? I saw Blanche little by little trying all her tricks. With infinite patience she prepared to snare me and bind me. She wanted to bring me down to her level; she cared nothing for me, she only wanted me to be hers. She was willing to do everything in the world for me except the one thing I wanted: to leave me alone."

（当一个女人爱上了你，除非连你的灵魂也被她占有了，否则她是不会感到满足的。因为女人是软弱的，所以她们具有非常强烈的控制欲，不把你完全控制在手就不甘心。女人心胸狭窄，对那些她理解不了的抽象东西非常反感。她们满脑子想的都是物质的东西，所以对于精神和理想非常嫉妒。男人的灵魂在宇宙的最遥远的地方邀游，女人却想把它禁锢在她的账簿里。你还记得我的妻子吗？我发觉Blanche一点一点地施展起我妻子的那些小把戏来。她以无限的耐心准备束缚限制我。她要把我拉低到她的水平；她对我这个人一点也不关心，唯一想的是叫我依附于她。为了我，世界上任何事情她都愿意做，只有一件事除外：不来打搅我。）            

12.爱情是女人的全部，却是男人的一小部分？看来作者要将歧视女性进行到底了！

“As lovers, the difference between men and women is that women can love all day long, but men only at times.”

（作为爱人，男人同女人的区别是：女人能够整天谈情说爱，而男人却只能偶尔为之。）

13.追求梦想？永不嫌晚！

“But you are forty”.  “That’s  what made me think it was high time to begin”

（但是你已经40了啊，所以我认为，是时候开始了。）

14.要么忙着活，要么忙着死？

“I tell you I've got to paint. I can't help myself. When a man falls into the water it doesn't matter how he swims, well or badly: he's got to get out or else he'll drown."

（我告诉你，我要画画。我无法控制自己。一个人要是跌进水里，他游得好坏，无关紧要，要么挣扎出去，要么淹死。）

15.别人的看法靠边站，Just Follow Your Hear！

“But here was a man who sincerely did not mind what people thought of him, and so convention had no hold on him.”

(这个人完全不在意别人的看法，因此传统对他没有产生任何约束力。)

是抬头望明月，还是低头捡便士？可不可以同时进行呢？望月望累了就低头捡便士，捡便士捡无聊了再抬头望月。好吧，我是一个世俗的人，能把艺术做到顶峰的人应该都是纯粹的人，哪能马马虎虎、三心二意。

有的时候，鱼与熊掌是不可兼得。就像我，继续工作的话会为没有好好陪孩子而遗憾，全职在家又会为放弃工作技能继续提升而遗憾。

只能好好想清楚自己最想做什么，做个选择而已。但行好事，莫问前程，时光匆匆，只求心安。