—— 选自Medium 网站（吉玛译）
Men need to understand a lot of things.
人需要了解世界万物。
If we’re talking about success, men need to understand that success can be defined in an infinite amount of ways.
从成功角度来说，人需要知道定义成功的方式成千上万。
If we’re talking about attracting the “ideal partner,” men need to understand that “ideal” is always a reflection of where you’re at in life — and also, what emotional state you’re bringing to the table, yourself.
从吸引“理想伴侣”角度来说，人需要明白“理想”是你生活的一面镜子,反映出你所处的生活处境——同时，反映出你自己的情绪状态。
If we’re talking historically and philosophically, men need to understand that patterns always repeat themselves, and the best way to predict the future is to study the past.
从历史和哲学角度来来说，人需要明白生活模式虽然总是“重蹈覆辙”，而预知未来的最好方法就是研究过去。
All men need to understand a lot of things in order to become their best selves while here on earth.
所有的地球人为了成为最好的自己，他们都需要了解世界万物。
But here are 3 truths every man needs to understand about life sooner than later:
但这里有三个关于生活的真理，每个人迟早都需要明白:
1.Success is a paradox.
1 .成功是一个悖论。
The more you achieve, the more you will want to achieve.
得到的越多，想要的就越多。
The more you will want to achieve, the easier it will be to see others as “below” you — and push them away.
你想要的越多，你就越容易看低别人，并远离他们。
The more you push them away, the smaller your circle gets. The less opportunities present themselves. The more you begin to live in emotional isolation.
越远离他们，你的圈子越小。他们出现机会越少，你便开始了离群索居的生活。
The less opportunities present themselves, the less you can become externally successful.
他们出现的机会越少，你在圈外成功的机会就越少。
The more you begin to live in emotional isolation, the less you feel fulfilled.
当你开始离群索居的生活，你会越发感到不满足。
Success, and the constant conquest of, is a paradox.
成功和不断的征服，是一个悖论。
The bigger you get, the harder you need to work on remaining small.
当你越强大，小空间并难以满足你。
2. If you cannot find love, it’s because you have not unlocked love within yourself.
2.如果你找不到爱，那是因为你把自己内心的爱上了“锁”。
Love is a reflection.
爱是一种反射。
When you are “in love,” what you’re really feeling is your own openness.
当你坠入爱河时，你并能真正感觉到你自己的爱的释放。
It is impossible to love someone else fully without being able to also fully receive their love. It’s symbiotic.
如果你没有得到其他人全心全意的爱，你也无法全心全意去爱他。两者是共生的。
People who “can’t find love” think it’s about the other person. They think they just can’t find anyone good enough.
那些“找不到爱”的人认为一切取决于他人。他们认为自己只是还没有找到合适的人。
In reality, they are not taking ownership of the emotions they themselves are bringing to the table — how open they are, willing, vulnerable.
然而在现实中，他们并没有把自己所拥有的情绪展现出来——他们是多么率真，乐意，脆弱。
If you want to find love, you have to first reveal your own love.
如果你想找到真爱，你必须首先要敞开自己爱的心扉。
In a nutshell: it’s the classic chicken before the egg scenario. What comes first? Should someone else love you first, before you can give your own love? Or should you willingly open your heart, and keep it open until someone willingly receives it — and gives it back?
简而言之: 爱情来临前的必要准备。首先 ? 在你爱被人之前，是否应该有人先爱你 ? 或者，你是否愿意一直敞开你的心扉，，直到有人心甘情愿地接受它——并回赠自己的爱?
3. Showing your “dominance” only ends up revealing weakness.
3 .显摆你的优势只会暴露出你的弱点。
From one of my favorite movies, American Gangster: “The loudest one in the room is the weakest one in the room.”我最喜欢的电影《美国黑帮》里有说到:“房间里最吵的人是房间里最弱的。
”As you get older as a man, you start to realize that it’s the men who feel the constant need to try to prove themselves that are actually the weakest. They need everyone to know how successful they are, how wealthy they are, how powerful they are, how “confident” they are.
当你老了，你就会开始意识到，那些总觉得需要不断地证明自己人往往是最弱的。他们需要每个人都知道他们有多成功，他们有多富有，他们有多强大，他们有多“自信”。
Little do they know, however, that anyone with a honed sense of self-awareness and a careful eye can see right through their facade.
然而，他们却不知道，任何一个自我意识和眼精心细的人都能看穿他们的“自信”外表下的脆弱。
Confidence isn’t found in a gold watch or an expensive car. It’s not found in a promotion, a title, a fatter paycheck. It’s not found with status, or achievement, or by “defeating” someone else.
拥有有金表或昂贵的汽车不代表你自信，晋升、头衔、丰厚的薪水也不是你自信的替代品。自信不是体现在地位、成就或“打败”别人的过程。
True confidence is a low hum that exists in who you are, the energy you exude, and your willingness to be open to the world.
真正的自信是沉淀于你默默无闻的内心世界，你散发的能量，以及你愿意向世界敞开胸怀。
Someone who is open has nothing to fear.
纯粹的人无所畏惧。
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