How to reject peopleelegantly in English?
Have you ever reject someone in English?
We are all masters to turn down people in Chinese, especially girls. When some guys make purpose to you, you always havereasons to close the door, am I right?
However, when it comes to English, do we feel thesame confidence as in Madrian?
During school English education, we are always beingtold to say yes, yes and yes. Honestly, it is always be polite to sayyes.
In fact. when we work in English, or travel to speakEnglish, there are many scenarios that we want to say no.
Unfortunately, due to lack of knowledge and phases,except saying “No, thanks”, we normally are out of words.
Recently I traveled to India with an Englishcolleague who taught me a wonderful lesson of say no. In one word, the best nois to express the no without no.
Three examples,
When ordering food, when you are asked “Do youwant some pork”. I would say, "I do not like pork, thanks". He said,"Well, Pork is my least of favor".
When asked whether you want to take black taxi, youwill say “no, I do not want, thanks”. He said “I am very close to thedestination!”
When asked whether you want to buy anexpensive souvenir in noise market, you may say “no, I just lookaround, thank you". He said “I may come back tomorrow and decide then”.
You see, none of the rejection has a no included butit expresses the equal meaning of No. That is the magic of English.
It is inevitable that rejected people will feel bad.But it is undeniable that rejection without “No” will let audience feel morecomfortable, preventing any further risk action he/she may against you.
Honestly, becomingthe master of rejection requires tons of practices, is there a short cut?
Let me give you one trick from my own experience.There is a common way to press No elegantly. Do you want to learn?
Here is a samplestructure, which includes only two steps. Firstly let us comment positively onthe intention. Secondly we should explain the difficulty prevents you agreeingthe intention immediately. And that is it.
For example, recently I was
asking some UK and India colleague to update a team page in confluence.
I asked “can you please help to update this page?”
Response from UK, Yes, it is important to do that.Currently I am waiting for results from team B.
Response from India,Yes, thank you for reaching me. I have limited information on my side to update.
Although neither answers
make me feel yes, but the conversation still looks smoothly.
Well, the elegant nois to let the audience feel respect then an implied no. So do remember, respectthen an implied no.
Well, I hope you have unlocked some skills. Whenever we want to say no, let us calm down before “N””O” jumping out of mouth, always think about other possibilities. Thank you.
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