昨天深夜，LQ老师在群里发了一段长文，与大家分享提高学生成绩的反思。看了最后一句：不忘初心，我想了想2015年我想从事这份工作的初心：
1. 在教学过程中，将生命传递给学生；
2.给自己较自由的空间，可以学习、做志愿者
现在将近4年过去了，结果如何呢？第二点确实有一些相对自由，但也绝不轻松，那些10小时的日子，去年10月忙到争分夺秒的日子，但也有新疆一个月中自驾；越南12天…
第一点是一段起伏的状态。回望最开始教学的日子，也是“毁”人不倦。把学生聊哭了，和人大小姑娘，北大才子成为了亦师亦友，这是最大的成功吧：既出分数，又达成了思想的交流。只是，剩下的呢？我启发了他们的兴趣吗？训练了思维吗？跳出了自己窄窄的框框嘛？I am afraid not! But I am still striving for that!
在外界的喧嚣竞争中，不要迷失自己：只为分数，忘了生命。
比如，前两天看的波西米亚狂想曲，比如现在听名渡山遼，我体会了音乐的力量。it seems impractical for us to listen to music or go to an exhibition. But the power of music is hard to imagine for people who have never been exposed to it. Take Bohemiam Rapysody as an example. I was shocked by the lyric, by the performance of Freedi. He was marginalized in the great society for his ethic, sexual preference. He cannot even gain the appreciation from his Dad when he was young. But he was clear about who he is, who he will be! He is destined to be a performer! He would use music to shock, to make his voice heard! Thus, when I listened to his music, I felt being echoed and released as someone who knows me well and clearly voices out! Likewise, when I listen to 名渡山遼，the ukulele melody seems to bring me to the shore of Hawaii, to provide me a fresh breath in the hustle and bustle life. That is the function of music and the magic of it!
That is the word I want to write, I want to teach! To experience and reflect life! Not simply memorize more words, phrases and articles!
回望这四年的工作，我依然坚持第一条理想，尽管现在做的还不够好。但另一条需要补充的是：那些美好的理想，都需要枯燥的努力，而不是为着自己感觉很爽，很放松。如果最后我希望学生可以四两拨千斤，留出更多时间去思考生命，那我就需要不断学习、总结，然后把那条“捷径”传递出去。
总有人为此负重前行！
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