The other night I was depressed.The second day too.I found myself crying over and over again listening to a French movie BGM in a Starbucks.My high school friend visited and we bought plane tickets to another nations. The expense of which is not affordable to me.
I was desperate.
Losing all the energy to writing my application essays I ask a few contact on my wechat for a drink.
One is down for a fever, another busy revising my essay. A Spanish dutch man replied and send out the invitation. Deep down I'm not really that much interested in this guy who's totally out of shape and looks short to me. And my crave for alcohol disappeared. The only reason I went was because my friends haven't give me feedbacks on my essays and I made my promise. Still I could use the chance to let out some steam.
I was 30 minutes late. And I bumped into a crew of hot guys too. Embarrassed but sexy! Anyway the first impression was just so so and the way he looked at my legs just made it worse. I thought he was some sort of Muslim. Bad opener lead to socially award situation it was really embarrassing I thought I'd just call it a night. We shifted to the seat right next to the audio. I was nearly deaf. However, the live show was good. And I sort of relaxed. The guy really is a boring person, judging by his performance. Who knows, you never know about human.
Anyway I got sort of high and my bra makes me feel sexy. I had the intention of getting drunk. The second drink I suggested getting out of the place. Daniel---right this guy has a name, even though I don't really if it's true, he also told me his Chinese name, something like 丹鳳， funny isn't it. Anyway he offered tea or coffee in his house, what a chance to get naked no? Cliche huh? His house was artsy, and I found a book, little princess. Not bad taste. With a picture of him and his girl friend on it. Yikes. The other notebook was his journal I guess, not much interested though. So it came pretty natural we had sex. But he came really fast. Like in no time. Dick is small enough to fit in my not so ready private part so I barely felt anything. Sucks. Showered. Second round, I just couldn't get aroused. Bad luck!
In the end I planned to stay the night, but I forced some facts out of him. He's got a girlfriend in Netherlands. Man. They just couldn't get hold of their dicks no? He said he just use tinder for one night stand, which just hit me with the hard reality. I want more, I linger but I came to realize that men are just men. So I dressed up and fled the place. I deleted tinder and an app alike. Not that Daniel has got to manipulated my mind but that I don't really want to use it when I am vulnerable. I guess I'm not smart enough right I still fall for this. It's really important to protect yourself, just so you know. I had a feeling that I've had enough, played enough now I'm ready to get down to the business. He should be a nice friend but I don't really want to involve in another drama anymore.
Tired.
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