Your interests are turned, in about equal proportions, both inward and outward.
Indeed, you're quite normal - in the sense that your personality is like that of most people.
Cynical, embittered, suspicious, you hate everyone. (Especially, but never to be admitted, yourself?)
The perfectibility of human race?
Sometime in your dim past, you were crossed, scorned, or deeply wounded by a woman.
So now you have a carefully constructed defense against further hurt.
You may possibly believe that a commitment is deeper and more meaning if freedom is available without judicial proceedings.
Self-denial, austerity, lonely contemplation- these are the characteristics of good life, so you claim.
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