Dear Eva, It will be almost a month since you wrote to me and you have possibly forgotten your state of mind (I doubt it though) .
You seem the same as always, and being you, hate every minute of it.
Don't!
Learn to say "X You" to the world every once in a while. You have every right to.
Just stop thinking, worrying, looking over your shoulder wondering, doubting, fearing, hurting,hoping for some easy way out, struggling, grasping, confusing, itching, scratching, mumbling,bumbling, grumbling, humbling, stumbling, rumbling, rambling, numbling, gambling, tumbling,scumbling, scrambling, hitching, hatching, bitching, moaning, groaning, honing, boning, horse-shitting, hair-splitting, nit-picking, piss-trickling, nose-sticking, ass-gouging, eyeball-poking,finger pointing, alleyway-sneaking, long waiting, small stepping, evil-eyeing, back scratching,searching, perching, besmirching, grinding, grinding, grinding away at yourself. Stop it and justDO.
停止思考，担心，多虑，徘徊，怀疑，恐惧，受伤，期盼有简单的出路，挣扎，固守，困惑，瘙痒，抓挠，自言自语，装模作样，愤愤不平，自卑自贱，磕磕绊绊，喃喃自语，东拉西扯，钻营投机，满口应声，淡淡涂抹，仓促完成，搭便车，画影线，发牢骚，抱怨，呻吟，嚎叫，挑刺，满口胡言，吹毛求疵，鸡蛋挑骨，迁怒于人，自作多情，漫天要价，夺人眼球，转嫁责任，偷偷摸摸，漫长等待，亦步亦趋，诅咒仇视，虎视眈眈，结党营私，搜索，停留，糟蹋，消磨，消磨，消磨殆尽你自己。停止这样，放手去做！
(这段简直太出色）
From your description, and from what I know of your previous work and you ability; the workyou are doing sounds very good.
"Drawing-clean-clear but crazy like machines, larger and bolder…real nonsense." That soundsfine, wonderful-real nonsense.
Do more, more nonsensical, more crazy, more machines, more breasts, penises, cunts,whatever-make them abound with nonsense.
Try and tickle something inside you, your "weird humor."
You belong in the most secret part of you.
Don't worry about cool, make your own uncool.
Make your own, your own world. If you fear, make it work for you-draw & paint your fearand anxiety.
创造你自己的，你自己的世界。如果你恐惧，那就让它为你服务——描绘出你的恐惧和担忧。
And stop worrying about big, deep things such as "to decide on a purpose and way of life, aconsistent approach to even some impossible end or even an imagined end".
而且不要担心宏大，深刻的事情，例如“去决定生活的目的和方式，以连贯的方式去抵达甚至不可能抵达的终点，或是某种想象中的终点。”
You must practice being stupid, dumb, unthinking, empty.
你必须尝试变得愚蠢，装聋作哑，不假思索，彻底放空。
Then you will be able to DO.
I have much confidence in you and even though you are tormenting yourself, the work you dois very good.
Try to do some BAD work.
The worst you can think of and see what happens, but mainly relax and let everything go tohell.
You are not responsible for the world-you are only responsible for your work-so DO IT.
And don't think that your work has to conform to any preconceived form, idea or flavor. Itcan be anything you want it to be.
另外，不用去想你的作品是否要遵从任何先入为主的形式，概念或风格。它可以成为任何你想要它成为的样子。
But if life would be easier for you if you stopped working-then stop. Don't punish yourself.
However, I think that it is so deeply engrained in you that it would be better for you to DO.
It seems I do understand your attitude somewhat, anyway, because I go through a similarprocess every now and again myself.
I have an "Agonizing Reappraisal" of my work and change everything as much as possible-andhate everything I've done, and try to do something entirely different and better.
Maybe that kind of process is necessary to me, pushing me on and on.
The feeling that I can do better than that shit I just did.
Maybe you need your agony to accomplish what you do. And maybe it goads you on to dobetter.
But it is very painful I know.
It would be better if you had the confidence just to do the stuff and not even think about it.
Can't you leave the "world" and "ART" alone and also quit fondling your ego.
I know that you (or anyone) can only work so much and the rest of the time you are left withyour thoughts.
But when you work or before your work you have to empty you mind and concentrate on whatyou are doing.
After you do something it is done and that’s that.
After a while you can see some are better than others but also you can see what direction youare going.
I'm sure you know all that.
You also must know that you don't have to justify your work -not even to yourself.
Well, you know I admire your work greatly and can't understand why you are so bothered byit.
But you can see the next ones and I can't.
You also must believe in your ability. I think you do.
So try the most outrageous things you can - shock yourself.
You have at your power the ability to do anything.
I would like to see your work and will have to be content to wait until Aug or Sept.
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