世上的爱都以聚合为目的,唯独父母对子女的爱以分离为目的。
著名诗人纪伯伦就曾写过一篇《你的子女其实不是你的》,字字恳切,发人深省,每个父母都该仔细读读!
《你的儿女其实不是你的》
Your children are not your children.
你的儿女,其实不是你的儿女。
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
他们是生命对于自身渴望而诞生的孩子。
They come through you but not from you,
他们借助你来到这个世界,却非因你而来,
And though they are with you, yet they belong not to you.
他们在你身旁,却并不属于你。
You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
你可以给予他们的是你的爱,却不是你的想法,
For they have their own thoughts.
因为他们有自己的思想。
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
你可以庇护的是他们的身体,却不是他们的灵魂,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
因为他们的灵魂属于明天,属于你做梦也无法达到的明天。
You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you,
你可以拼尽全力,变得像他们一样,却不要让他们变得和你一样,
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
因为生命不会后退,也不在过去停留。
You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth.
你是弓,儿女是从你那里射出的箭。
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,
弓箭手望着未来之路上的箭靶,
and He bends you with His might that His arrows may go swift and far.
他用尽力气将你拉开,使他的箭射得又快又远。
Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness,
怀着快乐的心情,在弓箭手的手中弯曲吧,
For even as he loves the arrow that flies, so He loves also the bow that is stable.
因为他爱一路飞翔的箭,也爱无比稳定的弓。
我们陪着孩子长大,却无法陪着孩子变老;我们养育孩子的身体,但也要尊重孩子的灵魂。真正睿智的父母,往往更愿意成为孩子的守护神,而不是掌控者。
有人说,父母子女之间,其实就是一场不可避免、漫长的告别。所以,我们终要学着洒脱地放手,子女也要学着独立的生活。在人生的道理上,父母只是领路人而已!
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