I will return
玩软件的时候偶然听到这首歌，熟悉的嗓音让人突然想起高考前戴着耳机单曲循环、刷着英语题的自己。静谧的迷茫、无措的悲伤，轻缓的前奏是情人间的喃喃呓语，悲亢的高潮是离别时一缕无奈的忧伤，每一声“咚”“咚”都是无限放大放缓的心跳。我挽住你的手，期望着你说不走，你紧抿着嘴角回头望我的眼眸，语言是最后的审判。左心房抑制不住紧张的跳动，沉默却似一只飞鸟用巨大的羽翼盖过喧嚣。
我知道的。
就像天空留不住风，山丘留不住河流。
而你，要走。无法挽留。
忽的又想起《这个杀手不太冷》里那个爱环胸坐着睡觉，穿内层挂满武器的黑色风衣，戴暗红色针织帽、圆形墨镜，收拾吊兰专注而认真的男人在送走玛婷达时说的：“你让我尝到人生的滋味，我开始想要过得快乐、睡在床上、有牵挂，你以后不会再觉得孤单了。”
在漆黑长夜里禹禹独行，品尝过鲜血和汗水的腥咸，在抓不住的子弹下苟延残喘。欲望是火山爆发后滚滚不绝的岩浆，一旦开始便停不下来。欲使人灭亡必先使其疯狂，而你脚踩刀尖，被生活奴役，看不到光。
直到有一天，她来了，流着眼泪请求你打开脆弱的门扉，闯入陌生的领域，没有任何防备，张扬任性像一头野性的小狮。她有着女孩们共同的天性，喜欢看幼稚的动漫，买数不尽的衣服，说起时尚潮流如数家珍，她率真恣意却又娇媚冷情。多好，十八九岁，花骨朵一样的年纪，没有枯萎。她坐在走廊上，把双腿伸到栏杆外面，悠悠的晃着，修长白皙的手指夹着一根烟，烟蒂明明灭灭，火光的尽头烟草被销毁，烟灰点点落下旋转楼梯。你回头，想说的话又憋回胸口。寒冷世界里，两个满身伤痕的人相遇，依偎着取暖，濡血自疗，自此，黑夜有了光。
里昂，你们的故事由枪声拉开序幕，最后也在枪声里结束。大概相遇就是为了更好的别离。你教会玛婷达的，玛婷达教会你的，温暖和爱。时间来不及，你又匆匆离去，安慰不过是场含蓄的告别。
说好的：I will return.
变成了：I will protect you. I promise.
一别两宽。
我知道的。
你很好，我也很好。
只是没能在一起。
时光不会垂头静守，那些没说完的话、没写完的情诗、没喝完的酒、没出口的对不起和想念，都可能在第二天苏醒的清晨，被永远封印在回忆的箱匣里。年华是无效信，信的背面盖着“查无此人”的邮戳。
就像那位妇女在给远赴越南战场的丈夫的信中写道：
Remember the day I borrowed
your brand new car and dented it?
I thought you'd kill me
But you didn't.
And remember the time I dragged you
to the beach
And you said it would rain, and it did.
I thought you'd say, "I told you so."
But you didn't.
Do you remember the time I flirted with
all the guys
To make you jealous, and you were.
I thought you'd leave, .
But you didn't.
Do you remember the time I spilled strawberry pie all over your car rug?
I thought you'd hit me,
But you didn't.
And remember the time I forgot to tell you
the dance was formal
And you showed up in jeans?
I thought you'd drop me,
But you didn't.
Yes, there were lots of things you didn't do.
But you put up with me, and loved me,
and protected me.
There were lots of things I wanted to make up
to you when you returned from Vietnam.
But you didn't.
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