这篇文章，我将重点聊聊当我还是一个留学生初到澳洲时，发现当地人与我们中国人的五大不同特质：对陌生人充满热情，喜欢表达，直接，终身学习，随意，户外运动狂热者。

对陌生人充满热情

刚来这边，就发现有陌生人在街上跟我打招呼，“嗨，你好吗？”当时我超级惊讶，心想，“他们难道是在跟我说话？”一段时间后我才渐渐习惯，并也开始入乡随俗。我的一位来自尼泊尔的朋友也与我分享了她类似的经历。刚到阿德的她，在第一天她的室友就开始跟她似老友重逢般聊天。她很讶异，想着，这个人应该是错把我当成她的一个朋友了吧，我们估计长得很像。但后来，她才意识到，否，这只是当地人表现友善的一种方式。

同时，阿德人还不吝对他人的赞美之词。在日常生活，我总能轻易收获各种称赞，很多时候甚至来自一些陌生人，比如：“我好喜欢你的这件上衣！”“你的笑容真灿烂”。温暖的话语，让我如沐春风。观察力也随之变得敏锐起来，能迅速捕捉到人们身上的一些微小而美好的地方了。当看到他们因我的称赞笑靥如花时，我的内心也随之幸福的跳跃歌唱。

那么，到这里，你可能要问了，人们为什么会这样呢？一阵资料查阅及好友咨询，我认为主要有以下两个原因：

1. 澳大利亚作为一个孤立的岛国，与世界其他国家相距甚远，而且地广人稀。这无形中让此国孕育出了一种特别的社区文化：对合作与包容的提倡。

2. 该国是一个多元文化的移民国家。较早的定居者搬到这里的原因就是为了能摆脱自己国家严格的等级制度，来寻求一个全新的开始。另外，当地人习惯了这种各种文化大熔炉，他们喜欢探索新颖而有趣的人，美食和娱乐。

喜欢表达

我在上学时，对当地同学的口齿伶俐，还有他们在课堂讨论中展现的自信印象深刻。我还发现了一个有趣的不同，在这边，打断一个人的发言似乎很正常。而在中国，这则会被认为是一种不太礼貌的行为。因此，很多时候我一直处于等待状态，但等到最后我发现自己往往没机会发言了，因为讨论时间已到。于是，好心人送来温馨提示，我需要主动出击，而不是等到被问到时才开口说。于是我开始一点点转变。可以说，6年后的我，终于可以基本在讨论中能即刻表达自己的想法了。如果看到这里的你对此也有所共鸣，请记住：

不要担心。想想，我用了六年时间啊，所以请耐心。像婴儿学步一样，慢慢来。终有一天你一定会看到自己的华丽转变的！相信我。

当地人还喜欢将对彼此的情感（例如，爱和感激）直接表达出来。划重点时间到！他们的三个黄金高频词是：“谢谢”，“请”和“对不起”。而在中国，我们则更倾向于把爱和感激埋在心底。如果我们把谢谢挂在口边，我们的朋友很可能就会觉得我们太见外，没有将他们视为密友。因此，对于刚到澳洲的中国人，请记得频繁使用以上词汇哦。否则，当地人很可能会认为你不礼貌。了解文化差异真的很重要。

澳洲人的这种喜欢表达在他们的肢体语言里也暴露无遗。你会发现，他们说话时肢体语言特别丰富（手舞足蹈加眉飞色舞：））。朋友见面，拥抱则很常见。记得我去的第一家餐厅，我当时和一个服务员聊得很投机。临走前，她上前拥抱我不说，还亲了下我的脸颊。我当时就愣住了，因为我在中国还完全没有过这种经历。作为中国人，我们一直都是推崇以含蓄为美。我们中很多人可能从来都没有拥抱或亲吻过自己的父母/朋友，更不用说是陌生人了。我们觉得用身体接触来表达情感很别扭。这一点在我们的运动中也可以明显看到。我们一般更喜欢选择较少身体接触的运动项目，例如羽毛球和乒乓球。

这又是为什么呢？同样有两点原因。

1. 与我们自古以来的传统礼仪系统密不可分。我们从小就被灌输，不能无缘无故地触摸他人的身体，尤其是男女之间授受不亲。

不过，我们也有自己互相致敬的方式。例如拱手礼或握手。

2. 我们更倾向于通过行动来表达我们的爱，而不是用话语或肢体语言。例如，当我们用餐时，我们倾向于主动夹菜到家人或朋友的盘中。

但是，可能是我的天性使然，我开始喜欢这种拥抱的方式。因为从人与人之间的身体接触中，我能更直接的感受到一种温暖的传递，觉得两个人的距离被无形中神奇的拉近了。记得有一次，我因为一件事心情低落，我的一个朋友说：“我想给你一个大大的拥抱”，紧接着她就走上前，抱了抱我。虽然这只是一个小小的举动，但我却觉得内心被爱瞬间融化。那一刻，我觉得自己不是孤单的一个人，身边还有很多人愿意帮助我，陪我一起渡过难关。

直白

澳大利亚是一个低语境国家，这里的人们通常会很直接的告诉你他们的真实想法。而中国作为一个高语境国家，我们更需要付出努力从上下文中去猜测人们的真实意图。我更喜欢前者的直接，因为我本身就不擅长猜测。我认为它更容易造成误会的产生，因为每个人对一件事物的理解可能都会有所不同。在我看来，最好的沟通是直接让对方知道你的意思/想法。

两年前，当我的房东兼朋友告诉我我做的一件事让她很失落时，我在一开始，心里觉得特别不舒服。但后来，却很庆幸她的行为。因为如果她不说，我可能永远都不会知道她为何对我不满。所以在我看来，直接说出你的想法更有助于关系的持久。

那么这种不同又是如何导致的呢？

我认为是价值观的差异。中国重视集体主义，而澳大利亚人则更偏向个人主义。在中国，不直接把话说白能防止丢面子，从而让关系和谐。在我们看来，如果不知道一个问题的答案，会很多人觉得在面子上过不去。因此，在中国，谈话的责任方是倾听者，他需要通过各种姿势，表情和语气从说话者那里参透出其真正的含义。但在澳洲，演讲者才是主角，他需要让听众能理解他所传达的信息。因此，“你是否听懂了我的意思”是这里的一个非常常见的问题。所以，温馨小贴士时间：在澳洲做演讲时，强烈建议你准备理由，例子，要点，以使每个人都能清晰明白你的信息。

终身学习

我在大学曾遇到过一对老夫妇。起初我以为他们是教授，但聊天后才得知他们其实和我一样，刚开始他们的大学时光。他们都已退休，但因为一直想学习这个专业，所以又重回校园。这让我很感叹，因为如果在中国，这个年龄的人大多应该都在照顾他们的孙子、孙女儿吧。

休闲随意的衣着

穿着人字拖，在大街上休闲游走，是这边的一道独特风景线。那他们在家呢？光脚，即使在他们的后院中也依然如此。我觉得这样做很好，因为特别亲近自然，你能够感知到地球内部的能量。只不过，对于我而言，还需要时间去习惯：）

户外爱好者

在这里，人们喜欢在街上慢跑，周末与家人到近郊爬山或在沙滩上打排球。我很喜欢这种活力四射的精神状态。当当地朋友得知我不会游泳时都相当惊讶。因为在这里，游泳是他们学校的一门必修课。

你知道吗？Glenelg是我人生中第一次到过的大海，谁让我是在江南长大的呢？所以你可以想象到，我看到海的激动。至于游泳嘛，它已被纳入我的待做事项里。这种每天有期待，每天能拥抱不同色彩的感觉真好。

我的变化：

在中国，我被各种友情提示，不要和陌生人说话，因为你可能会被骗。但在这里，我却角色跳转，成为了主动去搭讪陌生人的人，哈哈。

你知道吗？

我在学习时，为了提高英语，曾在等公车或坐公车时主动找人聊天，当然是搜寻那些看上去比较友好的人。如果你也想提高你的英文流利度，那我强烈推荐这种做法哈。你可能会担心，如果一个人拒绝与我交谈，那岂不是很尴尬？当然不。大不了换一个人就是啦。反正大家本来就不认识 ：）请记住，既然在异国，就要充分利用这里的资源啊~

如果你有不同的见解或者有趣的故事，欢迎与我分享：）

 下一篇，我将和大家聊聊当地的俚语和你应该知道的主要礼节。敬请关注啦。

Part 3

In this post, I am going to focus on Adelaide people. From my observation, Adelaidians have the following characteristics:  

· welcoming and friendly

· expressive

· direct

· Lifelong learning

· informal

· lovers of the outdoors

Welcoming and friendly (laid back)

Initially, I felt very surprised when strangers greeted me on the street with a smile, “Hi, how are you?” I was wondering, “Oh, are they talking to me?” It took me a while to get used to it and started to act as the Romans do J One of my friends from Nepal shared a similar feeling with me. When she arrived here, her housemate came to talk to her on the first day. She thought, oh, she must have mistaken me for someone else. Later on, she realised, no, this is just the way that people show their friendliness.

Also, people here like to make a positive comment about you, and that can come even from a stranger, “I like your dress!” “You have a lovely smile”. That really brought warmth to my life. And I learned to be more observant towards nice little things about people too. Seeing their happy faces after receiving my genuine comments also made my heart sing.

Why do people behave like that then? Well, after research and consulting my lovely friends, I summarised two main reasons below:

1. Australia is a big land with a small nation, far from the rest of the world. This developed a community culture within the nation: co-operative and inclusive.

2. The country is a multicultural nation of immigrants. Earlier settlers moved to here for a fresh start and get away from the strict class system back home. Also, locals are used to high levels of immigration. They like novelty and interesting people, food and entertainment.  

Expressive

During my studies, I was so impressed by how confident and articulate my local classmates were during our discussions in class. One noticeable difference is they interrupt while another person is talking. Whereas in China, we don’t normally do that. Because that is considered to be rude. Therefore, a lot of times, I waited and waited, but I didn’t get a chance to talk in the end. That is a big learning curve for me. I was told that I need to speak up instead of waiting to be asked. I started to change, and become better and better. So if you resonate with this situation, please remember:

Don’t worry. Just relax and be patient. Take baby steps, and you will get there eventually. Trust me ：）

Locals tend to say “thank you”, “please” and “sorry” a lot, and express their emotions verbally to one another (e.g., love and gratitude). Whereas we don’t say those much in China. We like to put love and appreciation in our hearts without showing them by words. If we do that, our friends will think we do not regard them as close friends. Politeness is more used among acquaintances. So if you are a newcomer to Australia, please use those words above more often. Otherwise, people might think you are a bit impolite. That’s why being aware of cultural difference is crucial.

Being expressive is also shown in their body language. You will find a lot of hugs here. I still remember the first restaurant I went to, I had a lovely conversation with a waitress. Before leaving, she hugged me and kissed my cheeks. I got so shocked. I’ve never experienced that in China before. Back home, we are much more reserved. We don’t even hug or kiss our parents/friends, let alone strangers. We are really hanxu (restrained). People do not feel comfortable expressing emotions and feelings through intimate physical contact. You can also find that in sports too. Chinese people are usually better and more interested in individual sports with less body contact, such as badminton and table tennis.

Why?

1. Digging into Chinese history, we have a traditional manner system called “Manner”（礼）. That is, you do not touch other’s body without reason especially between a man and a woman. We have our own traditional way instead, such as bow (with hands folded in front) or handshake.

2. We show our love through actions instead of intensely personal and intimate declarations. For example, when we dine out, we tend to cut the meat and bring it to our family/friends’ plates.

However, I have started to like hugs more and become more expressive too. Because having physical contact with people can be very warm and loving. I remember once when I was feeling down, my friend said, “Let me give you a hug”, and she did. That really melted my heart, and I knew she had my back (showing caring for me).

Direct

As a low-context country, Australian people are generally very direct. They tell you what they really think. Whereas in China (a high-context country), we need to put more efforts into guessing people’s real intentions. I definitely prefer the Australian directness, because by nature I am just not good at guessing. I think guessing can also create misunderstanding sometimes, because people have different interpretations. So it’s much better to let the other person know what you really mean/think.  When my friend and landlord first told me something I did that really upset her, I felt very confronted. But later on, I was pleased that she told me. Because otherwise, I would have never known she was unhappy with me. Being direct helps to build a harmonious relationship in the long term.

Why are we so different?

I think because our values differ. China values collectivism while Australians are more into individualism. Therefore, in China, to be ambiguous helps to maintain the harmonious relationship and prevent a loss of face. For example, not knowing the answer to a question loses face. So it’s the listener’s responsibility to draw meaning from the speaker by posture, expression and tone of voice. However, in Australia, the speaker has the prime responsibility to make their message understood to their listeners. Therefore, ‘Do you understand what I mean’ is a very commonly asked question here. Also, when doing a  presentation in Australia, PREP- point, reason, example, reiteration of a point is extremely recommended to make communication clearer for everyone.

Lifelong learners

I met two people on my campus. Initially, I thought they must be professors, but I found out actually they were like me, just starting uni too. They have already retired, but because they always wanted to study, they decided to make it happen. That really impressed me, because, in China, that is not very common. People at that age normally spend a lot of time taking care of their grandchild.     

Informal

Slippers (flip-flops in particular) are commonly seen people wear on the streets. What about at home? Barefoot, even in their backyard. I do like that, as you become so close to nature, and you are able to touch the energy inside the ground. However, I haven’t gotten used to that yet J.

Lovers of the outdoors

It’s so common to see people jogging on the street, going hiking with their family during weekends, or playing volleyball on the beach. So energetic, and I love seeing that spirit. My friends were so surprised to find out I didn’t know how to swim. Here, it’s a compulsory skill to acquire at school.

Do you know?

Glenelg is also the first beach I’ve ever been in my life. But I am catching up, and that makes life exciting ahead ：）

My Change

In China, we were told that should never speak to a stranger, because you do not want to get tricked. However, here, I have been the one to initiate the conversations with people who I don’t know.

Do you know?

To improve my English, I initiated the conversations while I was waiting for my bus or on the bus. It is very helpful for your English fluency. Highly recommended J If a person refuses to talk to you, so what? Change to another person. You didn’t know either of them anyway J Remember, to make the most of your experience here.

What’s next?

I am going to discuss Australian etiquette and some stories related to their interesting slang. Meanwhile, if you have any interesting stories happened in Australia or different insights, welcome to share with me. I would love to hear ：）