[本番] I SWEARED

Hello, dear visitors, I am Sprite.

I am a normal mid age married woman,

I have a job, but I am not promoted for 8 years.

I have 2 kids.

Everyday I have to work 10 hours, and spend 4 hours to take care of my kids.

Sometimes I feel my life is hard, hopeless.

Even so, I still want to have an exciting,passionate, energized life.

Actually,I did try to get some suggestion from someone else.

 She is my grandmother.

She was so great woman, I do admire her， even she has already gone for 2 years.

She had 4 children, 10 grand kids, 11 grand kids’ kids.

Whenever her birthday came.

A big big family birthday party would be held.

Whenever her kids, grand kids said “happy birthday” to her, she always smiled happily,she thought she was the happiest woman in the world.

Outside people always praised my family is a harmony, model family. 

But, at the ending 2 years of her life.

She got sick.

Cannot move, cannot speak, cannot eat, finally cannot breath.

In the final 2 years of her life, my antes, my uncles, my dad and mom, argue to each other day by day, just to escape from the responsibility of taking care of that dying old woman.

The most harmony model family has gone;

The final moment remain in my dearest grand mother’s eyes is argument and pain.

I cannot accept this fact.

I love my grandmother, she’s so kind heart woman, she never think about herself, she dedicated all her life to our family.

She had a good beginning, why can’t she have a good ending.

She deserved a better life.

So, I learnt from my grandmother’s life that:

A good beginning not means we will have a good ending.

Life will change, we can not control our life.

So, I have to live in moment.

I sweared, I will spend all my life to love my life.

I sweared for what?

Let me introduce for you.

I.S.W.E.A.R.E.D

I:instrument.

I always dream to there is one day, a handsome guy will play guitar and sing love song for me. Of course, I never have such chance. Why not play myself and create romantic moment formyself?

So, I really like to learn to play some instrument, just love myself

S: Sing.

I can not sing well. But I still like and keep singing. Because it really makeme relax.

W:Write.

I can not live without write. Because I have sensitive brain, easily interact with people’s emotion, if I can not write it down I will have headache. Writing is good medicine to heal my headache.

E:Express. 

2 years ago, when I stood on public speech stage first time. I could not open my mouth. I was frustrated so much. One of the member comfort me. He said he has same personality with me, introvert silent style, but he is also expressive type, these 2 personalities do not conflict. After that I did proof that I am also an introvert but expressive personality. I did better and better on the stage.

A:appreciate.

I do appreciate to all my life. I used to be hurt but I am healed,I used to be lost, but I am found. All the past bad experience will finally count in to my fortune. I believe.

R: Read,

Reading really make feel peaceful.

Those hundreds books lying inside my brain really make me proud of myself.

E:English.

I love my life I keep curiosity of my world. So, I like to learn global language to explore more this big big world.

Finally,D: drawing.

I do enjoy the feeling when I am drawing. Reality is not perfect, I am proud of myself that I can create a perfect dream with my painting pen.

All in all. I am a shy introvert type people, but it doesn’t stop my love to express my love  towards my life and the big big world.

I sweared , I will live in moment, I will enjoy life.

I will keep enjoy expressing myself to the world.

Thank you for loving me.

I love you too.