I just spent 4 precious hours of mine watching WHY WOMEN KILL,
which I have promised to someone long time ago.
And I suddenly realized something that I am too excited to sleep over this.
I always call myself a 进步主义者， ‘cuz I always support new ideas which can't be publicly accepted by most people. BUT sometimes 我又会觉得自己过于正直
OR 对某些事物的观念过于死板甚至迂腐
Especially when it comes to human morality or integrity.
什么偷盗、抢劫、杀人之类的
They are all stuff of harming people, which I can't approve at all.
Although I know a famous quote from a Russian sociologist 马雅可夫斯基说过的：
「当社会把你逼的走投无路的时候，不要忘了，你身后还有一条路，那就是犯罪，记住，这并不可耻。」
I totally understand what he said.
所以遇到大家一起谴责某些社会热议的犯罪事件时我往往会保持沉默。
'Cuz I know，事出必有因。
我并不知道这个人这么做纯粹是因为他是个 jerk or 因为他走投无路而只能同归于尽了。
But it is really hard for me to tolerate those who did "lesser evil."
因为这种如同蚊虫叮咬一般的小打小闹只是让人生嫌
而且根本没有必要，路多着呢非要走这一条去伤害别人的路
BUT when I saw the man hit his wife so violently just 'cuz he was insecure, afraid of her leaving.
我突然意识到做出伤害他人的事情，
一来根本不需要灌输厚黑学思想来让他渐渐失去“良心”
二来也不需要在“良知”尚存的情况下不停的自我欺骗来让自己“狠心”
先手做出伤害他人利益、感情、财产、机会、时间、生命etc.（not justifiable defense）
只需要一样东西
AFRAID
又一个一直被我忽视的埋藏在祖先基因里的不受控制的既存事实
有时觉得自己书读多了读傻了，就会把人类想得太过文明太过先进
就真觉得我们所处的是一个道德控制的社会
忘了隐藏在人类本性里的原始驱动：
去主动加害一个无辜的人根本不需要什么思想斗争也不需要什么内心邪恶
他只需要怀疑这个人会加害于他就行了
哪怕这种怀疑无凭无据
BTW.事后也很好找理由开脱
“I was too scared!”
"What if he comes first? Who knows!"
“我只是害怕自己在这段感情中再受到伤害而已！”
当然，中国人叫这有备无患
我们不仅很会找借口还很会 make it classic and fancy.
所以啊
人类一直就是这种又可怜又可悲又可恨的矛盾生物
不是吗
Well, don't mention TRUST.
Did that ever existed? LOL~
真好，我也找到个借口了，嘻嘻
虽然我自己根本不会相信什么“害怕受伤”啦哈哈哈
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