There’s a deeper element to the process that’s tricky to contend with. You shouldn’t have to do anything to be happy with yourself.
If you realized how capable you were in the first place, you wouldn’t need to pursue goals at all. The itch would already be scratched.
You should be okay with yourself as you are because, on the whole, there’s nothing really wrong with you.
You have some strengths and talents. I’ve yet to meet someone with no blessings in their life. You have some weaknesses — not even weaknesses really, just things you aren’t naturally as good at as other people.
There are certain things you define as flaws, but that definition is flawed because other people with the same traits don’t view them as flaws at all. Your view of yourself is highly subjective.
It can help to understand the subjectivity of your own self-perception. You don’t have to feel the way you feel about yourself. You’re choosing to, even if that choice feels objective.
It’s paradoxical.
You have to fix your life and simultaneously understand that you’re not broken.
You make improvements in your life for the sake of making those improvements. You feel better about yourself because you’ve made positive changes, but your self-perception changed, not because of the changes themselves, but because those changes gave you the permission to feel better about yourself that you could’ve given yourself all along.
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