0101 The One Where Monica Gets a New Roommate
小y不长rou
Scene 1 Central Perk
Monica: There’s nothing to tell! He’s just some guy I work with!
Joey: Come on, you’re going out with the guy! There’s gotta be something wrong with him!
Chandler: So does he have a hump?A hump and a hairpiece?
Phoebe: Wait, does he eat chalk? Just, ‘cause, I don’t want her to go through what I went through with Carl.
Monica: Okay, everybody relax. This is not even a date. It’s just two people going out to dinner and not having sex.
Chandler: Sounds like a date to me.
Chandler: All right, so I’m back in high school, I’m standing in the middle of the cafeteria and I realize I’m totally naked.
All: Oh, yeah. Had that dream.
Chandler: Then I look down, and I realize there’s a phone, there.
Joey: Instead of……?
Chandler: That’s right.
Joey: Never had that dream.
Phoebe:No.
Chandler: All of a sudden, the phone starts to ring. And it turns out is my mother, which is very-very weird because she never calls me!
Ross:Hi!
Joey: This guy says hello, I wanna kill myself.
Monica: Are you Okay, sweetie?
Ross: I just feel like someone reached down my throat grabbed my small intestine, pulled it out of my mouth, and tied it around my neck……
Chandler: Cookie?
Monica: Carol moved her stuff out today.
All:Ohh
Monica: Let me get you some coffee.
Ross: Thanks.
Ross: No, no, no don’t! Stop cleansing aura! No, just leave my aura alone, okay? I’ll be fine, alright? Really, everyone. I hope she’ll be very happy.
Monica: No you don’t.
Ross: No I don’t, to hell with her, she left me!
Joey: And you never knew she was a lesbian……
Ross:No!! Okay?! Why does everyone keep fixating on that? She didn’t know, how should I know?
Chandler: Sometimes I wish I was a lesbian…… Did I say that out loud?
Joey: Alright Ross, look. You’re feeling a lot of pain right now. You are angry. You’re hurting. Can I tell you what the answer is? Strip joint! Come on, you’re single! Have some hormones!
Ross: I don’t want to be single, Okay? I just…… I just wanna be married again!
Chandler: And I just want a million dollars!
Monica: Rachel?!
Rachel: Oh, God, Monica, hi! Thank God! I just went to your building and you weren’t there and then this guy with the big hammer said you might be here and you are, you are!
Waitress: Can I get you some coffee?
Monica: De-caff. Okay, everybody, this is Rachel, another Lincoln High survivor. This is everybody, this is Chandler, and and Phoebe, and Joey, and you remember my brother Ross?
Rachel: Sure! Hi!
Ross: Hi!
Monica: So you wanna tell us now or are we waiting for four wet bridesmaids?
Rachel: Oh, God…… well, it started about a half hour before the wedding. I was in the room where we were keeping all the presents and I was looking at this gravy boat. This really gorgeous Limoges gravy boat. When all of a sudden…… Sweet ‘n’ Lo? I realized that I was turned on by this gravy boat than by Barry! And then I got really freaked out, and that’s when it hit me: how much Barry looks like Mr. Potato Head. You know, I mean, I always knew he looked familiar,but…… Anyway I just had to get out of there, and I started wondering “Why am I doing this, and who am I doing this for?” So anyway I just didn’t know where to go, and I know that you and I have kinda drifted apart, but you’re the only person I knew who lived here in the city.
Monica: Who wasn’t invited to the wedding.
Rachel: Ooh I was kinda hoping that wouldn’t be an issue……
NEW WORDS
1、hump
美 [hʌmp]
英 [hʌmp]
n.（平面上的）大隆起物；（尤指）土墩；（某些动物的）峰；（尤指）驼峰
----查自Bing词典
此处钱德勒调侃莫妮卡，问和莫妮卡一起吃饭的男士有没有驼背，所以这个单词可以用来指“驼背”。
2、hairpiece
美 ['her.pis]
英 ['heə(r).piːs]
n.（使头发看上去更长或更浓密的）假发
----查自Bing词典
3、chalk
美 [tʃɔk]
英 [tʃɔːk]
n.（白色或彩色的）粉笔
----查自Bing词典
4、cafeteria
美 [.kæfə'tɪriə]
英 [.kæfə'tɪəriə]
n.自助餐厅；自助食堂；咖啡厅
----查自Bing词典
5、naked
美 ['neɪkəd]
英 ['neɪkɪd]
adj.不穿衣服的；无遮盖的；赤裸的
----查自Bing词典
6、ring
美 [rɪŋ]
英 [rɪŋ]
v.响；铃声；铃响
----查自Bing词典
7、weird
美 [wɪəd]
英 [wɪəd]
adj.怪异的；不可思议的；可怕的
----查自Bing词典
8、sweetie
美 ['switi]
英 ['swiːti]
n.（用作称呼语）亲爱的
----查自Bing词典
9、grab
美 [ɡræb]
英 [ɡræb]
v.抓住
----查自Bing词典
10、intestine
美 [inˈtɛstin]
英 [ɪn'testɪn]
n.肠子
----查自Bing词典
11、stuff
美 [stʌf]
英 [stʌf]
n.东西；物品
----查自Bing词典
12、cleanse
美 [klenz]
英 [klenz]
v.使免除（罪过）；使净化
----查自Bing词典
13、aura
美 ['ɔrə]
英 ['ɔːrə]
n.气质;灵气
----查自Bing词典
14、lesbian
美 [ˈlɛzbɪərn]
英
n.女同性恋者
----查自Bing词典
15、hormone
美 ['hɔr.moʊn]
英 ['hɔː(r)məʊn]
n.激素；荷尔蒙
----查自Bing词典
16、million
美 ['mɪljən]
英 ['mɪljən]
num.一百万；大量
n.无数；百万元；百万(镑,美元,法郎)
----查自Bing词典
17、hammer
美 ['hæmər]
英 ['hæmə(r)]
n.锤子；榔头；木槌
----查自Bing词典
18、de-caff
n.网络无咖啡因的咖啡
----查自Bing词典
19、bridesmaid
美 ['braɪdz.meɪd]
英 ['braɪdz.meɪd]
n.女傧相；伴娘
----查自Bing词典
20、gorgeous
美 [ˈɡɔː(r)dʒəs]
英
adj.漂亮的；艳丽的；美丽动人的；光彩夺目的
----查自Bing词典
21、Limoges
美 [liˈmoʊʒ]
英 [liˈməuʒ]
利摩日（法语：Limoges，奥克语：Limòtges）是法国南部上维埃纳省Haute-Vienne的一个城市。
----查自Bing词典
22、issue
美 ['ɪʃu]
英 ['ɪsjuː]
n.问题；重要议题
----查自Bing词典
PHRASE
1、go out with
【约会】
2、 Instead of
【代替；而不是】
3、All of a sudden
【突然间】
4、turn out
【结果是】
5、reach down
【向下伸】
6、pull sth out of
【把......从......中扯出来】
7、tie sth around
【将......缠在......上面】
8、move out
【搬走】
9、get you some coffee
【给你点杯咖啡】
10、to hell with her
【去她的；让她见鬼去吧】
11、fixating on
【围着......转；只知道注意......】
12、Strip joint
【脱衣舞俱乐部】
13、Lincoln High survivor
【该学校风气不好，将成绩较好的比喻为“幸存者”】
14、gravy boat
【船形肉汁盘】
15、 Sweet ‘n’ Lo
【低脂糖】
16、turn on
【转身。句中的意思是瑞秋甚至会更为船形肉汁盘转身而不是巴瑞，也就是说船形肉汁盘比巴瑞更有吸引力】
17、freak out
【吓坏了】
18、drifted apart
【感情疏远】
小y不长rou
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