Alice's Restaurant

今天查了下英语角提到的英文歌曲“Alice's Restaurant”，顺手摘抄在这里。

歌词好长啊！

This song is called Alice'sRestaurant, and it's about Alice, and the restaurant, but Alice's Restaurant isnot the name of the restaurant, that's just the name of the song, and that'swhy I called the song Alice's Restaurant.

You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant.

You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant.

Walk right in it's around the back Just a half a mile from the railroad track.

You can get anything you want at Alice's Restaurant.

Now it all started two Thanksgivings ago, was on - two years ago on Thanksgiving, when my friend and I went up tovisit Alice at the restaurant, but Alice doesn't live in the restaurant, she lives in the church nearby the restaurant, in the bell-tower, with her husband Ray and Fasha the dog. And livin' in the bell tower like that, they got a lotof room downstairs where the pews used to be in. Havin' all that room, seein'as how they took out all the pews, they decided that they didn't have to take out their garbage for a long time.

We got up there, we found all the garbage in there, and we decided it'd be a friendly gesture for us to take the garbage down to the city dump. So we took the half a ton of garbage, put it inthe back of a red VW microbus, took shovels and rakes and implements of destruction and headed on toward the city dump.

Well we got there and there was a bigsign and a chain across across the dump saying, "Closed on Thanksgiving." And we had never heard of a dump closed on Thanksgiving before, and with tears in our eyes we drove off into the sunset looking for another place to put the garbage.

We didn't find one. Until we came toa side road, and off the side of the side road there was another fifteen footcliff and at the bottom of the cliff there was another pile of garbage. And wedecided that one big pile is better than two little piles, and rather thanbring that one up we decided to throw our's down.

That's what we did, and drove back to the church, had a thanksgiving dinner that couldn't be beat, went to sleep and didn't get up until the next morning, when we got a phone call from officer Obie. 

He said, "Kid, we found your name on an envelope at the bottom of a half a ton of garbage, and just wanted to know if you had any information about it." And I said, "Yes, sir, Officer Obie, I cannot tell a lie, I put that envelope under that garbage."

After speaking to Obie for about fourty-five minutes on the telephone we finally arrived at the truth of the matter and said that we had to go down and pick up the garbage, and also had to go down and speak to him at the police officer's station. So we got in the red VW microbus with the shovels and rakes and implements of destruction and headed on toward the police officer's station.

Now friends, there was only one ortwo things that Obie coulda done at the police station, and the first was he could have given us a medal for being so brave and honest on the telephone,which wasn't very likely, and we didn't expect it, and the other thing was he could have bawled us out and told us never to be see driving garbage around the vicinity again, which is what we expected, but when we got to the policeofficer's station there was a third possibility that we hadn't even counted upon, and we was both immediately arrested. Handcuffed. And I said "Obie,I don't think I can pick up the garbage with these handcuffs on." He said,"Shut up, kid. Get in the back of the patrolcar."

And that's what we did, sat in theback of the patrol car and drove to the quote Scene of the Crime unquote. I want tell you about the town of Stockbridge, Massachusets, where this happenedhere, they got three stop signs, two police officers, and one police car, but when we got to the Scene of the Crime there was five police officers and three police cars, being the biggest crime of the last fifty years, and everybody wanted to get in the newspaper story about it. And they was using up all kinds of cop equipment that they had hanging around the police officer's station.

They was taking plaster tire tracks,foot prints, dog smelling prints, and they took twenty seven eight-by-tencolour glossy photographs with circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back of each one explaining what each one was to be used as evidence against us.Took pictures of the approach, the getaway, the northwest corner thesouthwest corner and that's not to mention the aerial photography.

After the or deal, we went back to thejail. Obie said he was going to put us in the cell. Said, "Kid, I'm going to put you in the cell, I want your wallet and your belt." And I said,"Obie, I can understand you wanting my wallet so I don't have any money tospend in the cell, but what do you want my belt for?" And he said,"Kid, we don't want any hangings." I said, "Obie, did you thinkI was going to hang myself for littering?"  

Obie said he was making sure,and friends Obie was, cause he took out the toilet seat so I couldn't hitmyself over the head and drown, and he took out the toilet paper so I couldn't bend the bars roll out the - roll the toilet paper out the window, slide down the roll and have an escape. Obie was making sure, and it was about four orfive hours later that Alice (remember Alice? It's a song about Alice), Alice came by and with a few nasty words to Obie on the side, bailed us out of jail,and we went back to the church, had a another thanksgiving dinner that couldn'tbe beat, and didn't get up until the next morning, when we all had to go to court.

We walked in, sat down, Obie came in with the twenty seven eight-by-ten colour glossy pictures with circles andarrows and a paragraph on the back of each one, sat down. 

Man came in said,"All rise." We all stood up, and Obie stood up with the twenty seveneight-by-ten colour glossy pictures, and the judge walked in sat down with a seeing eye dog, and he sat down, we sat down. Obie looked at the seeing eyedog, and then at the twenty seven eight-by-ten colour glossy pictures with circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back of eachone, and looked at the seeing eye dog.

And then at twenty seven eight-by-ten colour glossy pictures with circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back ofeach one and began to cry, 'cause Obie came to the realization that it was a typical case of American blind justice, and there wasn't nothing he could do about it, and the judge wasn't going to look at the twenty seven eight-by-tencolour glossy pictures with the circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back of each one explaining what each one was to be used as evidence against us. Andwe was fined $50 and had to pick up the garbage in the snow, but thats not  what I came to tell you about.

Came to talk about the draft.

They got a building down New YorkCity, it's called Whitehall Street, where you walk in, you get injected,inspected, detected, infected, neglected and selected. I went down to get myphysical examination one day, and I walked in, I sat down, got good and drunkthe night before, so I looked and felt my best when I went in that morning.`Cause I wanted to look like the all-American kid from New York City, man I wanted, I wanted to feel like the all-, I wanted to be the all American kid from New York, and I walked in, sat down, I was hung down, brung down, hung up,and all kinds o' mean nasty ugly things. And I waked in and sat down and theygave me a piece of paper, said, "Kid, see the phsychiatrist, room604." And I went up there, I said, "Shrink, I want to kill. I mean, Iwanna, I

wanna kill. Kill. I wanna, I wannasee, I wanna see blood and gore and guts and veins in my teeth. Eat dead burntbodies. I mean kill, Kill, KILL, KILL." And I started jumpin up and downyelling, "KILL, KILL," and he started jumpin up and down with me andwe was both jumping up and down yelling, "KILL, KILL." And thesargent came over, pinned a medal on me, sent me down the hall, said,"You're our boy."

Didn't feel too good about it.

Proceeded on down the hall gettinmore injections, inspections, detections, neglections and all kinds of stuffthat they was doin' to me at the thing there, and I was there for two hours,three hours, four hours, I was there for a long time going through all kinds ofmean nasty ugly things and I was just having a tough time there, and they was inspecting,injecting every single part of me, and they was leaving no part untouched.Proceeded through, and when I finally came to the see the last man, I walkedin, walked in sat down after a whole big thing there,

and I walked up and said, "Whatdo you want?" He said, "Kid, we only got one question. Have you everbeen arrested?"

And I proceeded to tell him the storyof the Alice's Restaurant Massacre, with full orchestration and five partharmony and stuff like that and all the phenome... - and he stopped me rightthere and said, "Kid, did you ever go to court?"

And I proceeded to tell him the storyof the twenty seven eight-by-ten colour glossy pictures with the circles andarrows and the paragraph on the back of each one, and he stopped me right thereand said, "Kid, I want you to go and sit down on that bench that saysGroup W .... NOW kid!!"

And I, I walked over to the, to thebench there, and there is, Group W's where they put you if you may not be moralenough to join the army after committing your special crime, and there was allkinds of mean nasty ugly looking people on the bench there. Mother rapers.Father stabbers. Father rapers! Father rapers sitting right there on the benchnext to me! And they was mean and nasty and ugly and horrible crime-type guyssitting on the bench next to me. And the meanest, ugliest, nastiest one, themeanest father raper of them all, was coming over to me and he was mean 'n'ugly 'n' nasty 'n' horrible and all kind of things and he sat down next to me andsaid, "Kid, whad'ya get?" I said, "I didn't get nothing, I hadto pay $50 and pick up the garbage." He said, "What were you arrestedfor, kid?"

And I said, "Littering."And they all moved away from me on the bench there, and the hairy eyeball andall kinds of mean nasty things, till I said, "And creating anuisance." And they all came back, shook my hand, and we had a great timeon the bench, talkin about crime, mother stabbing, father raping, all kinds ofgroovy things that we was talking about on the bench. And everything was fine,we was smoking cigarettes and all kinds of things, until the Sargeant cameover, had some paper in his hand, held it up and said.

"Kids,this-piece-of-paper's-got-47-words-37-sentences-58-words-we-wanna- know-details-of-the-crime-time-of-the-crime-and-any-other-kind-of-thing-you-gotta-say-pertaining-to-and-about-the-crime-I-want-to-know-arresting- officer's-name-and-any-other-kind-of-thing-you-gotta-say",and talked for forty-five minutes and nobody understood a word that he said,but we had fun filling out the forms and playing with the pencils on the benchthere, and I filled out the massacre with the four part harmony, and wrote it downthere, just like it was, and everything was fine and I put down the pencil, andI turned over the piece of paper, and there, there on the other side, in themiddle of the other side, away from everything else on the other side, inparentheses, capital letters, quotated, read the following words:

("KID, HAVE YOU REHABILITATEDYOURSELF?")

I went over to the sargent, said,"Sargeant, you got a lot a damn gall to ask me if I've rehabilitatedmyself, I mean, I mean, I mean that just, I'm sittin' here on the bench, I meanI'm sittin here on the Group W bench 'cause you want to know if I'm moral enoughjoin the army, burn women, kids, houses and villages after bein' alitterbug." He looked at me and said, "Kid, we don't like your kind,and we're gonna send you fingerprints off to Washington."

And friends, somewhere in Washingtonenshrined in some little folder, is a study in black and white of myfingerprints. And the only reason I'm singing you this song now is cause youmay know somebody in a similar situation, or you may be in a similar situation,and if your in a situation like that there's only one thing you can do andthat's walk into the shrink wherever you are ,just walk in say "Shrink,You can get anything you want, at Alice's restaurant.". And walk out. Youknow, if one person, just one person does it they may think he's really sickand they won't take him. And if two people, two people do it, in harmony, theymay think they're both faggots and they won't take either of them.

And three people do it, three, canyou imagine, three people walking in singin a bar of Alice's Restaurant and walkingout. They may think it's an

organization. And can you, can youimagine fifty people a day,I said fifty people a day walking in singin a bar ofAlice's Restaurant and walking out. And friends they may thinks it's amovement.

And that's what it is , the Alice'sRestaurant Anti-Massacre Movement, and all you got to do to join is sing it thenext time it come's around on the guitar.

With feeling. So we'll wait for it tocome around on the guitar, here and sing it when it does. Here it comes.

You can get anything you want, atAlice's Restaurant

You can get anything you want, atAlice's Restaurant

Walk right in it's around the back Justa half a mile from the railroad track You can get anything you want, at Alice'sRestaurant That was horrible. If you want to end war and stuff you got to singloud.

I've been singing this song now fortwenty five minutes. I could sing it for another twenty five minutes. I'm notproud... or tired.

So we'll wait till it comes aroundagain, and this time with four part harmony and feeling.

We're just waitin' for it to comearound is what we're doing.

All right now.

You can get anything you want, atAlice's Restaurant

Excepting Alice

You can get anything you want, atAlice's Restaurant

Walk right in it's around the back

Just a half a mile from the railroadtrack

You can get anything you want, atAlice's Restaurant

Da da da da da da da dum

At Alice's Restaurant