b. Your two “yous” fight to control you.
“两个你”在争夺对你的控制权。
Let’s look at what tends to happen when someone disagrees with you and asks you to explain your thinking. Because you are programmed to view such challenges as attacks, you get angry, even though it would be more logical for you to be interested in the other person’s perspective, especially if they are intelligent. When you try to explain your behavior, your explanations don’t make any sense. That’s because your lower-level you is trying to speak through your upper-level you. Your deep-seated, hidden motivations are in control, so it is impossible for you to logically explain what “you” are doing.
我们来看看当有人和你意见不同并要求你解 释你的想法时,会发生什么样的事。因为你的大 脑构造让你把这样的做法视为攻击,所以你会变 得愤怒,尽管你更合理的反应应该是对另一方的 观点产生兴趣,尤其是当这些观点明智的时候。 当你试图解释自己的愤怒行为时,这些解释令人 无法理解。这是因为,在你愤怒时,是较低层次 的你在通过较高层次的你说话,深植于你内心的 各种隐蔽动因在控制你,导致你无法理性地解 释“你”的行为。
Even the most intelligent people generally behave this way, and it’s tragic. To be effective you must not let your need to be right be more important than your need to find out what’s true. If you are too proud of what you know or of how good you are at something you will learn less, make inferior decisions, and fall short of your potential.
连最聪颖的人通常也会表现出这样的行为, 这很令人遗憾。要有效行事,你就绝不能允 许“想要自己正确”的需求压倒“找出真相”的需 求。如果你对自己掌握的知识和擅长的事情过于 自豪,你学到的东西就会变少,决策质量就会变 低,也将难以充分发挥自己的潜力。
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