How do you help people be consistent long enough to formulate habits? 如何帮助人们养成持之以恒的习惯?
So you have to use intrinsic and extrinsic motivations 你必须同时使用内在外在的推动力
So you have to start everybody off with "Why is it important for you to be able to develop these new beliefs? " 所以,你必须先让别人了解“建立起新的信念对你来说到底有多重要?”
Like, what would your life be like if you had them right now?What would your family life be like? 例如,如果你现在拥有这些信念,你的生活会是什么样子?你的家庭生活会是什么样子?
You have to give them a benefit that's greater than the switch cost. 你必须让他们看到改变带来的好处大于代价
So the switch cost is something that our brain resists. 我们大脑所抵触的是改变所需付出的代价
The only human that likes change is a wet baby! 唯一想要改变的人是尿床的婴儿
Every other human being is resistant to it ,because safety first in homeostasis and energy conservation. 其他人都会抗拒改变,因为在于体内平衡以及节能的角度来说安全是最重要的
So we are biologically wired not to want to change. 因此我们在生理上的设定是抗拒改变的。
So we have to deliberately coax the brain into motivational reasons, emotional reasons, you have to have intrinsic reason "Why must you do this?" 因而我们必须刻意诱导大脑 与激励因素和情感因素绑定,你必须拥有个内在的理由:为什么你必须这么做?
And so you can use pain as a frame, as well "So if you don't, than are you okay with your life being like this at this age, in 5 years, in 10 years, in 20 years ?" 你也可以用痛苦作为行为的框架:如果你不作出改变,你是否对你目前的生活, 5年后,10年后,20年后,你对生活还感到满意吗?
And if you're okay with that, then you're not a candidate for change. 如果你对此满意,那你就不需要做出改变
But if you're committed to letting go of the old, so you can create the new, and you create motivations every day, and you create motivations every day, that's where the power is . 但是如果你决心放下过去的你,创造出新的自己,并且每天都产生推动力,这就是力量的来源
Remember earlier, "Progress, not perfection " 还记得刚才讨论过的吗?“追求进步,而非完美”
So anybody can do one minute, or 10 seconds. 任何人都能从1分钟、10秒钟开始做起来
So if you can start to formulate a habit, a daily habit, a weekly habit. 因此,如果你可以开始养成一个习惯,每天、或者每周的习惯
It doesn't matter how long it is, if you can create that space in your brain, that on this day, at this time, this is what I do, and you do that repeatedly, that becomes a habit, and it takes those 66 days or so for a simple habit that you have to consciously do to then the habit ding you. 无论是花多少时间都好,如果你可以在大脑中创造这样的区域,到了这一天或者这个时间,我就是要做这件事并且反复进行,它将会变成一个习惯,这会花大概66天左右的时间来养成1个简单的习惯,你必须有意识地去进行,知道习惯会自动地驾驶你
And that's why they say, “We are all creatures of habit."这就是为什么他们说:我们都是习惯的奴隶
Because habits run themselves, their subconscious programs just run themselves. 因为习惯会自动运作,人们的潜意识程序会自行运行
Most people don't take the time to become aware "What are my empowering habits? "And then the next question is "Well, how do I release this one ? And how do I strengthen this one? or create a whole new one? " 大多数人不花时间去了解: 是什么习惯让我内心变得强大?然后下一个问题是:那么我该如何去除这个习惯?我该如何加强这个习惯?或者重新培养一个新习惯?
And what we're looking to do is building empowering habits that then run their course. 而我们需要做的是建立起让自己内心变得强大的习惯,然后让它自行运行
I have this rituals line, as well, I do something called "Brush and Prime " 我有个日常仪式,我把它称为“刷牙进入状态”
So on my bathroom mirror, I have my goals, that are on my mirror. So that as I'm brushing my teeth, I'm priming my brain to see my goals in front of me every morning and every night. 在我的浴室镜子上贴着我的目标。如此一来,每天早上晚当我刷牙的时候,我会看着镜子上的目标让我的大脑进入状态
And then the accomplishment boards reminds me, whenever I look at the stuff that I've accomplished ago, that wasn't easy. There were a lot of ups and downs, highs and lows, failures, times I thought I'd quit and I didn't . 而我另外有个成就板提醒着我,每当我看到那些已经取得的成就时,我想:这些成就并不容易达到,有很多起起落落、各种失败, 我以为我会放弃但是最终坚持下来的时刻。
So it's to remind me to go through the times, that I don't think I'm gonna be able to achieve those things. 这些都在提醒着我,无论遇到什么困难,曾经同样艰难的时刻,我都以及战胜过来
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