The key to giving good feedback when someone is having difficulty is to keep her believing that success is still within her reach.
给出正确反馈的关键在于要让人相信通过努力是可以成功的。
When we attribute our poor performances to broad abilities rather than specific skills, we are more likely to lose confidence and not bother even trying to improve.
当我们把我们糟糕的表现归结于泛泛的能力而不是具体的某个技能时,更容易让我们丧失信心放弃努力。
People with low self-esteem are even more likely to overgeneralize what they hear than those with high self-esteem.
相对于那些自尊心较强的人来说自尊心较弱的人更容易将他们听到的过度概括。
Studies show that praising hard work when it doesn’t pay off can easily make the recipient feel even more stupid.
研究表明当人们通过努力但是却没有获得成功时,如果说他们工作努力会让人感觉像是说自己是个蠢蛋。
Praise can be motivating or undermining, depending on what you say and how you say it.
夸奖能够提升人们做事的积极性,但是也会起反作用,这取决于你夸别人什么以及怎么夸。
Praise should be sincere—or, at the very least, it should seem sincere.
夸奖首先应该真诚,或者说最起码让人听起来是真诚的。
The praise that you give should emphasize, whenever possible, behaviors that are under the recipient’s control.
夸奖别人是你要强调别人能控制的行为。
When you praise, avoid comparing the recipient to others.
当你夸别人时,切忌和别人家的孩子比较。
Praise should be given in a way that doesn’t undermine the recipient’s sense of autonomy.
夸别人切忌破坏别人的自主感。
Praise should always convey attainable standards and expectations.
夸奖应该总是传达可以获得标准以及期望。
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