每个人都想付出了得到回报，然而，这个世界上唯一能够被爱的方法，就是不苛求回报，主动付出。
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How To Stop Worrying and Start Living
- Chapter 36 -
人性的优点
“The ideal man,” said Aristotle, “takes joy in doing favors for others.”
What joy they got out of these gifts—the joy of giving without expecting anything whatever in return!
If we want to find happiness, let’s stop thinking about gratitude or ingratitude(忘恩负义) and give for the inner joy of giving.
But why should children be thankful—unless we train them to be?
Ingratitude is natural—like weeds.
Gratitude is like a rose.
It has to be fed(施肥) and watered and cultivated and loved and protected.
If our children are ungrateful, who is to blame?
Maybe we are.
If we have never taught them to express gratitude to others, how can we expect them to be grateful to us?
So let us remember that to raise grateful children, we have to be grateful.
Let us remember “little pitchers have big ears”—and watch what we say.
To illustrate—the next time we are tempted to belittle(轻视) someone’s kindness in the presence of our children, let’s stop.
Let’s never say: “Look at these dishcloths(洗碗布) Cousin Sue sent for Christmas.
She knit them herself.
They didn’t cost her a cent!”
The remark may seem trivial(不重要的) to us—but the children are listening.
So, instead, we had better say: “Look at the hours Cousin Sue spent making these for Christmas!
Isn’t she nice?
Let’s write her a thank-you note right now.”
And our children may unconsciously absorb the habit of praise and appreciation.
To avoid resentment and worry over ingratitude, here is Rule 3:
A. Instead of worrying about ingratitude, let’s expect it.
Let’s remember that Jesus healed ten lepers(令人厌恶的人) in one day—and only one thanked Him.
Why should we expect more gratitude than Jesus got?
B. Let’s remember that the only way to find happiness is not to expect gratitude, but to give for the joy of giving.
C. Let’s remember that gratitude is a “cultivated” trait; so if we want our children to be grateful, we must train them to be grateful.
2018-05-30
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