What are some of the first things you do in the morning?
你晨起后的第一件事是什么？
I woke up this morning, like I do every morning, at 4am.
我今天早上也像平时一样，4点就起床。
This is what I look like at 4:00 am. I am clearly not a morning person.
这就是我那时的样子。很显然我不是一名晨型人类。
I’m tired, I’m cold, I’m pissed off and just generally not to be fu#*ed with.
我很累、很冷、心里超不爽但也没啥脾气。
You’re probably thinking, “Wow, you must have to go to work REALLY early.”
你可能会想，“哇，你一定是要上非常早的班吧。”
Well, you’re wrong. I choose to do this…
好吧，你错了。我是自愿这么做的……
Why?
为啥呢？
Because, despite looking & feeling like a turd that was assaulted with pepper spray, this is when I get the most sh*t done.
因为，我那时除了看上去像坨屎或可能因此被人误认为是坏蜀黍而喷胡椒粉外，我真的能在早上就干完大部分的事情。
You see, there is an art to starting yourself up at 4am when you’re not a morning person. It’s a lot like starting up a crappy car in cold weather or starting a fire by rubbing two sticks together.
你看，这就是一门艺术：将不是晨型人的自己在早上4点叫起。感觉就像是在一个很冷的早上发动一辆古怪的汽车、或者像用两根棍子摩擦生火一样。
It’s methodical.
这是有方法可循的。
It’s frustrating.
这是让人抓狂的。
It takes many tries to get it right.
你要尝试很多次才能抓住要领。
It is The Art of the Routine.
这是作息规律的艺术。
Here is mine:
我是这么安排的：
4:00 am: Wake up, put on a ridiculous oversized hoodie.
4:00：起床，穿上大号滑稽的套头衫。
4:00 - 4:05 am: Stumble to the coffee maker, start making coffee (light roast, I hear it has more caffeine).
4:00 - 4:05：挣扎着走到咖啡机旁边，开始做咖啡（轻烤，我听说这会让咖啡具有更多的咖啡因）
4:05 - 4:15 am: Stretch, listen to my body make assorted cracking sounds, maybe fart once or twice.
4:05 - 4:15：拉伸，听自己的身体发出稀奇古怪的声音，也许放一两次屁屁。
4:15 - 5:00 am: Write. This is where the magic happens. I get more high-quality writing done in this 45-minute window than I would in 3 hours at night. No joke.
4:15-5:00：写作。这就是见证奇迹的时刻了。我在这45分钟会写出高质量的文字。而这些让我在晚上就是花3个小时也不可能写的出来。真不是开玩笑。
So, by this point, I’m all wired from the coffee and creative energy. This is what I look like now:
所以，就这一点看，我就是咖啡和创造力的奴隶。这是我现在看起来的样子。
No bueno. Need to chill out.
哎呀，不妙。需要冷静下了。
5:00 to 5:15 am: Meditate. It looks like I’m just twitching on a cushion but trust me, I’m actually in a deep state of tranquility and inner peace. This gets me mentally prepared for my next task…
5:00 to 5:15：冥想。我看起来像在垫子上抽搐，但是信我，哥其实正处在深层次地平静和内心的宁静中。这将使我为接下来的工作储备精神上的能量。
5:15 to 5:50 am: Answer emails and clear my inbox. FML.
5:15 to 5:50：回邮件、清理邮箱。（FML的意思是Fuck My Life，翻译成中文就是我*蛋的人生）
5:50 to 7:00 am: Go to Crossfit, unleash the inner beast (thinking about emails and scheduling for rage-based-motivation).
5:50 to 7:00：去Crossfit健身房，释放内心的野兽（想想邮件、忍住体内的洪荒之力来做计划）
7:00 to 8:00 am: Cold Shower (best body hack ever), breakfast (usually oatmeal and a protein shake) and head to the office. At this point the 30-minute, steamy, hellish morning commute on public transit doesn’t even phase me.
7:00-8:00：冷水澡（身体最佳黑客）、早餐（通常情况下是燕麦片和蛋白质奶昔），然后前往公司。这时的30分钟，是在潮湿如地狱般的早高峰通勤中完成的，但是并不会击垮我。
By the time I’m at work, I look happier thana hammer in a nail factory(pretty sure that’s an expression) and I’m ready to crush the day.
（标蓝的部分，来自一个流行语：I'd rather be a Hammer than a Nail...我宁愿当个锤子，也不要像钉子一样被人随意捶打。）
当我开始公司的工作时，我看起来像打了鸡血一样（很确定的是，那就是个表情）我已经做好准备来迎战新的一天。
** UPDATE: A lot of people have been asking me what time I go to sleep (understandably so). 9:00 to 9:30 pm works well for me but your mileage will vary.
更新：很多人问我什么时候上床睡觉（也是能理解）。我一般是9:00-9:30，但是你可以制定自己的作息计划。
Also, WOW, the response to this is unbelievable, 1.2K upvotes and counting! You guys rock!
我去，对于这个回答的反馈太难以置信了，1200的赞，你们太赞了！
If I had known this many people would read this answer I might have left out the yoga-fart bit. Oh well. **
如果我知道会有这么多人阅读这个回答，我可能会把瑜伽时放屁屁的部分给略过的。好吧……
安娜译
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