前言
最近去电影院观看了艾玛沃特森和汤姆汉克斯的反乌托邦科幻电影，The Circle，这里不做剧透。这部电影让我想起了国外媒体兴起讨论的一种新时代的症状，“社交媒体焦虑症”，它代表了人们被隔空而来的巨大信息量和分享攀比的压力所包围的恐惧。写作方式有参考William S. Burroughs的Naked Lunch，但他那种极端变态的文字我写不出来。这些大概就是我写作这篇文章的灵感来源。
原文是用英文写的，后作者自行译成了中文。
Enjoy：）
Paranoia 2017
妄想症2017
They are trying to merge us all into one.
他们试图把我们全部融为一体。
The Others are lurking outside your bedroom door, listening to your every heartbeat. Their presence is slowly encroaching upon your own. Pretty soon you will no longer belong to yourself. They want to know your every move.
其他人潜伏在你的卧室门外，聆听着你的每一拍心跳。他们的存在正慢慢侵蚀着你自己的。很快你就不再属于自己了。他们想要知道你的一举一动。
You think about a time in the past when none of this existed. The life you are living now would have seemed so outlandish back then. Everyone is into everyone else's business. And you want to be known, like a crystal chandelier hanging in public library. We've each grown a thousand eyes, like flies.
你想起过去的一段时光，当这一切都不存在。你现在过的生活在那时看来是多么不可思议。每个人都感兴趣每个其他人的事情。而且你想被人知晓，就像挂在公共图书馆的一盏水晶吊灯。我们每个人都长了一千只眼睛，像苍蝇。
In my blurry mind I vaguely remember how we used to love talking about the stars and moon at night. Do you know? The moon walks when you walk, and it stops when you stop. It's as if the moon is stalking you. It makes you feel like the most special person in the whole world.
在我模糊的思绪里我隐约记得我们曾热衷讨论夜晚的星星和月亮。你知道吗？你走月亮就会走，你停月亮就会停。就好像月亮在跟踪你一样。这让你感觉像是全世界最特殊的人。
Sitting inside the Uber cab I'm spacing out, staring at the new moon, awed by its magnificent radiance. How long has it been? When was the last time I felt genuinely glad to be alive, and living every moment?
坐在Uber车里的我在走神，盯着一轮新月，惊叹于它美妙绝伦的光辉。有多久了？上一次我真诚地感到很高兴活着，并且活在每分每秒是在什么时候？
We are always so exhausted these days, our eyes ever so locked to our portable interactive screens. What's inside the screen merges with what's outside, so you see your entire world, trapped in tiny spaces and abstract forms of representation.
这些天我们总是那么的筋疲力竭，我们的眼睛总是锁在我们的便携互动屏幕上。屏幕里面的和屏幕外面的交错融合，于是你看到了你的整个世界，被围困在渺小的空间和抽象的表现形式里。
Your mind is becoming parasitic, your iPhone the all-encompassing host. You can't eat, sleep, think, or feel without looking at it. You can't even write on a piece of paper for Christsakes. Speaking of Christ, does anybody knows where he's at? Perhaps I should search for him on the Internet as well.
你的意志变得像寄生虫，你的iPhone是包容一切的寄主。不看着它，你就无法吃饭，睡觉，思考或感受。你甚至不能在一张纸上写作，看在耶稣基督的份上。说到基督，有人知道他在哪吗？或许我连他也应该到网上去寻找。
'Tis a time when “minding your own business” doesn't mean anything. You're gonna move along with the current, or you'll get washed away in no time. Your business is everyone's else's business. Everyone else's business is yours. You belong to the world. The whole world belongs to you. Don't you disappear on me. You and I both know, they're gonna hunt you down for "not participating" enough.
这是一个“少管闲事”没有任何意义的时代。你要跟着潮流行进，不然过不了多久你就会被冲走。你的闲事就是所有人的闲事。所有人的闲事都是你的。你属于世界。全世界都属于你。不要在我面前消失。你和我都很清楚，他们会因为你“参与不够”而对你穷追烂打。
Nobody thinks on their own anymore. Independent thinking is so antisocial. Pull your Brain out and share it with the rest of us. Strike a fabulous pose and take 5 seconds of your life and let everybody know. Because they all want to know. They are not overwhelmed by the sheer amount of notifications they receive at all.
已经没有人还在独自思考了。独立思考是如此地反社会。把你的脑子拽出来分享给我们大家看。摆一个炫酷的姿势，记录5秒你的生活然后让所有人都知道。因为他们都很想知道。他们才没有被他们收到的通知提醒数量压垮。
The ghosts of the Others are now banging at your door. Why aren't you posting in the virtual world? Stop hiding in reality! Are you a recluse? How can you not reply to my message within 10 seconds? With so many conveniences, aren't you supposed to be everywhere, and do everything?
其他人的鬼魂在敲打你的门了。为什么你不在虚拟的世界里发帖呢？别再躲在现实里了！你是个隐士吗？为什么你不在10秒内回复我的信息？有这么多的便利，你难道不应该无处不在，无事不做？
They are breaking into your room. No secrets should be allowed. It's a sin to let others worry about you, don't you know? You ought to have put on a show of yourself, so that we know you are ok. Do let us watch you every minute, will ya?
他们正在强行挤进你的房间。秘密不应该被允许。让别人为你担心是罪恶的，你难道不知道？你应该为自己上演一台好戏，这样我们就知道你过得挺好。一定要让我们关注你的每分每秒，好吗？
Their pleas are buzzing in the back of your mind whatever you do. When you're listening to music, reading a book, watching a movie, trying to write a prose. You feel a certain guilt rising inside. The guilt of not sharing, not reporting instantly what you've done and learned in life. The guilt of concentrating only on one thing, at one time. After all, how hard could “it” be? The hundreds of Snapchats you deliberately choose to ignore are sneering at you from the upper right corner of the app logo.
不管你做什么，他们的乞求都在你的脑后嗡嗡作响。当你听着音乐，读着一本书，看着一部电影，试着写一篇散文。你感到一种愧疚在内心升起。没有立即分享，立即汇报你在生活中做了什么又学到了什么的愧疚。只能集中精力在一件事，在一段时间的愧疚。话说，“那样”又有何难？你故意忽略的几百条Snapchat消息从App图标的右上角对你传来嘲笑。
The Others will always be out there waiting for you. You secretly wonder, shouldn't it entirely be my choice to leave or enter this room? Why am I made to feel shame when I am not Together with the Others? Thoughts like these always occupy a spot in my crowded mind. But I already have too much noise in my head to pay attention to trivial confusions.
其他人永远会在外面等着你。你悄悄地疑惑着，进出这个房间难道不应该完全是我的选择吗？为什么当我没有和其他人在一起，我会感到羞耻？像这样的想法总是在我拥挤的大脑里占据一席之地。但我头脑中已经有太多的噪音，无法聚焦于一点无足轻重的困惑。
In this age of hustling instantaneousness, I am looking for something more. I hear a resonant voice from a distant past calling out to me, reminding me of an old yearning. A yearning to slow down time, a yearning to preserve, a yearning to create something meaningful that will last for a while. Not the two line post that gets flushed out of your feed every few seconds. Or a voyeur picture mocking at your bland everyday existence. How about creating a permanent piece of art? Would anyone jump for such thought? Do they still care?
在这个你追我赶，转瞬即逝的时代，我在寻找着更多的东西。我听到一个回响着的声音从遥远的过去对我召唤，唤起一种古老的渴望。一种让时间慢下来的渴望，一种保存的渴望，一种创造一点有意义，能存留一顿时间的事物的渴望。不是那种每过几秒就从你的推送栏里冲刷掉的两行帖子。或是一张偷窥私生活的图片嘲笑着你空虚的日常存在。创作一件永久的艺术品怎么样？还有人会为这样的想法跳起来吗？他们是否还在乎？
You must be able to understand this paranoia called 2017, you are living it, right now, not a minute less. I am secretly wishing for a counterculture tide against social medias to sweep across the planet and save our withering souls. But if not, what does it matter? There will always be another panic attack, another depression, another discontent whining soul like this one right here, typing her incoherent thoughts into her phone in pitch-darkness.
你一定能理解这种叫做2017的妄想症，你就活在里面，一分不少。我在私下里希望一股反社交媒体的反文化潮流扫遍全球，拯救我们枯萎的灵魂。但如果没有，那又有什么关系呢？总会有下一次恐慌发作，下一次抑郁，下一个不满意地抱怨的灵魂，比如这里这位，正在一片漆黑里把她语无伦次的想法输进手机。
2017 will be gone in a whiff. Rest in Peace.
2017吹口气就没了。愿你安息。
Paranoia lasts forever and ever. Amen.
妄想症会永远一直存在。阿门。
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