阅读小结
作者的丈夫可以说是她的灵魂伴侣和精神支柱，他们结婚11年。一次到亲戚家做客，她丈夫在健身房的椭圆机旁倒下，就再也没有醒来。巨大的悲痛向作者以及她的儿女袭来，每分每秒都是煎熬。在最初的日子里，总是悲从中来，但她想悲伤总会过去，时间会抚平伤口。亲戚朋友们都想办法安慰她，有一位60多岁长者，她在10多年前遭遇丧夫之痛，与作者分享了自己（及其他寡妇村朋友）的心路历程，说自己都现在都没走出来。这简直就是雪上加霜，非但没减轻作者的痛苦，反而更加剧了她的绝望，她认为自己也会和他们一样，不会再有快乐了。而且她还担心自己的孩子无法拥有一个快乐的童年以及成长为心智健全的成年人。
她想起丈夫的好朋友Adam，他是一位心理学家。她告诉Adam自己的想法，向他倾诉自己的痛苦，当然包括“寡妇村”的言论。让人欣喜的是，Adam给了她希望。他告诉作者“寡妇村”的想法太过消极。他给出了数据，大约50%的人在经历了六个月的极度的悲痛（acute grief）期后，痛苦会减轻；并且单亲家庭中成长的孩子，也能够身心健康地成长。
本书的作者通过自己的亲身经历以及心理学家朋友Adam的专业知识，为我们讲述还原能力（resilience）, 即如何从重大创伤中复原，重建生活的信心，重新找到快乐，恢复生活的正常轨道。
很期待后续的阅读。
生词短语
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ditch [dɪtʃ] v.
1 [非正式] 分手to end a romantic relationship with someone
2 [非正式] 抛弃；摆脱；丢弃 - to stop having something because you no longer want it.
** 原句: **
Dave used to say that when he met me it was love at first sight, but he had to wait a long time for me to become “smart enough to ditch those losers” and date him.
造句：
1-If he saw a policeman, he decided, he would have to ditch this car, steal another,and divert from his planned route.
2-Meg and Neil were due to marry, but she ditched him.
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love at first sight + for (of) sb. /sth.
一见锺情；一见倾心；闪电恋爱
造句：
1-It was like love at first sight, when I first met Tony, I had this strong connection.
2-It was love at first sight for me with my first girlfriend, but in the end she dumped me.
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rock n. (非正式）可信赖的人，精神支柱；靠山 a person who is emotionally strong and who you can rely on
** 原句: ** Dave was my rock.
造句：
1-My father is the rock in our family.
2- Her husband was the only rock of her life.
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drift v. 无意间进入；不知不觉陷入 （同义词: change) to gradually change from being in one condition, situation etc into another without realliziing it.
** 原句: ** For a refreshing change, I was actually winning, but my eyes kept drifting closed.
造句：
1-She was just drifting into sleep when the alarm went off.
2- He drifted in and out of consciousness.
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take over from 由...接手/接管/代替，取而代之，
** 原句: ** I started CPR. Rob took over from me. A doctor came and took over from him.
造句：
1-The new AI technology is invented, the labour workers are worried that it will take over their jobs.
2- China is not about to take over from the US as the benchmark market.
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in vain 徒劳；徒然；白白地
** 原句: **Their cousins came and lay down with us, all piled up in a big sobbing heap with adult arms trying in vain to protect them from their sorrow.
造句：
1- He is not into you. So stop texting messages to him, he won't reply.
2- It's in vain to give him the what he dosen't want.
喜欢的句子
1 - We all encounter hardships. Some we see coming; others take us by surprise.
2 - Option A is not available. So let's kick the shit out of option B. (kick ..out of 有”从..取乐“，”以……为乐“的意思）
3 - To fight for change tomorrow we need to build resilience today.
4 - We don't pretend that hope will win out over pain every day.
小作文
(故事纯属虚构，目的是为把笔记中的所有新词用上 oo）
A couple years before, I broke up with my boyfriend. More precisely, he dumped me. He used to be my best friend and my first love. Since the first time we met, I fell for him. This was a love at first sight, I guessed. I loved him so much that I felt like marrying him. He was my rock at that time.
When he told me: "we'd have our laughs but I don't love you anymore", I just couldn't let go of him. I still had the hope that we were having some kind of break. After that we would get back together. We were made for each other. I'd only got my eyes on him.
I kept texting him, calling him,QQing him and We-chatting him like we used to do. At first, he replied with patience, then just he answered with oh, ah,um. At the end, he reply nothing. He just kept away from me.
When I found out the really reason he ended this relationship was that he cheated on me, I was furious rather than anguish. I wanted to slap him in the ears. I wanted to punch him in the nose. I wanted to smash his face. I want a revenge. I figured out that maybe I could be a SMS spammer. So I began to booming his electronic gadgets with tons of meaningless messages which I simply copied from the news feeds by just using computer keyboards-- "Ctrl+C" and "Ctrl+V". I kept annoying him in this way until he changed his phone number--there was then no blacklist function on the phone.
Well, I knew I was insane, and what I did was totally in vain. But all I thought was how could he ditched me like that? I didn't want any other woman to take over my place from his heart. He was the option A for me, and I didn't have a plan B. How could I move on without him? I didn't have much resilience in those days, I was drifting into sleep on the couch every night in tears.
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