自深深处——王尔德致波西的信（七）
作者：奥斯卡·王尔德
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自深深处——王尔德致波西的信（七）
The morning after the day on which we were installed I feel extremely ill.
You have to go to London on business, but promise to return in the afternoon. In London you meet a friend, and do not come back to Brighton till late the next day, by which time I am in a terrible fever, and the doctor finds I have caught the influenza from you. Nothing could have been more uncomfortable for anyone ill than the lodgings turn out to be. My sitting-room is on the first floor, my bedroom on the third. There is no man servant to wait on one, not even anyone to send out on a message, or to get what the doctor orders. But you are there. I feel no alarm.
在我们安顿好的第二天早上，我感觉很不舒服，你有事得去伦敦，但答应下午回来。在伦敦你遇见了一个朋友，直到第二天很晚了，你才回到布莱顿， 那时我已经发起了可怕的高烧，医生发现我是感染了你的流感。任何人病了，都会发现再没有比那套公寓更不方便的地方了。我的起居室在二层，卧室在四层。那里没有男仆伺候，更别提能有什么人去发个信，或者去买医生吩咐的什么东西了。但有你在呢，我感觉没什么好担心的。
自深深处——王尔德致波西的信（七）
The next two days you leave me entirely alone without care, without attendance, without anything. It was not a question of grapes, flower, and charming gifts: it was a question of mere necessaries: I could not even get the milk the doctor had ordered for me: lemonade was pronounced an impossibility: and when I begged you to procure me a book at the bookseller's, or if they had not got whatever I had fixed on to choose something else, you never even take the trouble to go there. All the while you are of course living at my expense, driving about, dining at the Grand Hotel, and indeed only appearing in my room for money. On Saturday night, you having left me completely unattended and alone since the morning, I asked you to come back after dinner, and sit with me for a little. With irritable voice and ungracious manner you promised to do so. I waited till 11 o'clock and you never appear. I then left a note for you in your room just reminding you of the promise you had made me, and how you had kept it.
可接下来两天，你就把我孤零零的一个人扔在那儿，没人照顾，没人陪伴，什么也没有。这不是什么葡萄、鲜花、暖心礼物的事儿，而是最基本的生活必需品问题：我甚至连医生要我喝的牛奶都没有， 柠檬水就更别提了。我求你去书店帮我买本书，如果他们那里没有我要的，就随便帮我选本别的，可你就从来都不愿麻烦去那儿走一趟。而在此期间，自不必说，你的所有开销，都是我付账，车马出行，在大酒店的餐食 ，全由我支付。而你，如果的确在我房间里出现了的话，那只是为了要钱。那个星期六从晚上到第二天早上， 你把我一个人丢下不管不顾，我要求你晚餐后回来陪我坐一会儿。你很不耐烦地勉强答应了。可我一直等到十一点，你却再没露过面。于是，我在你房间里留了个条，提醒你是如何答应我的，又是如何履约的。
自深深处——王尔德致波西的信（七）
At three in the morning, unable to sleep, and tortured with thirst, I made my way, in the dark and cold, down to the sitting-room in the hopes of finding some water there. I found you. You fell on me with every hideous word anintemperate mood, an undisciplined and untutored nature could suggest. By the terrible alchemy of egotism you converted your remorse into rage.
You accused me of selfishness in expecting you to be with me when I was ill; of standing between you and your amusements; of trying to deprive you of your pleasures.You told me that you'd come back at midnight simply in order to change your dress-clothes, and go out again to where you hoped new pleasures were waiting for you, but that by leaving for you a letter in which I'd reminded you that you'd neglected me the whole day and the whole evening I'd really robbed you of your desire for more enjoyments, and diminished your actual capacity for fresh delights.
I went back upstairs in disgust, and remained sleepless till dawn.
凌晨三点，我睡不着，口渴难耐，就摸黑冒着寒冷下楼到起居室，想找点水喝，却发现了你。你恶狠狠的，毫无节制地朝我破口大骂，用尽了一个没有教养的、粗野的人才能想得出的语言。在可怕的唯我独尊的本性支配下，你把你的懊悔变成了暴怒。你骂我自私，生了病就想要你陪；说我对你和你的娱乐消遣横加阻挠，想剥夺你享受快乐的权利。你说你半夜回来，不过是要换件衣服，本想再出去继续寻欢作乐的，可我给你留下那么一封信，说你整天整夜把我扔下不管，这真是把你去寻找更多乐趣的心情，全给破坏了，害得你本来还想再去找些新鲜乐子的，都没了兴致。
我满怀厌恶回到楼上，一夜未眠直到天明……
———未完待续
（真念一思译）
（图片来自网络，向原作者致敬致谢！）
自深深处——王尔德致波西的信（七）
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