Singing Snowberg
Chapter Three
Hide-and-seek <3>
Chros©
“Cyano, Cyano, Cyano... I love you, even the rule says I can’t.” I feel his hand. Okay, this is a good apology. I’m a jerk, he is too warm and too good for me. “I’m sorry, it wasn’t me.” His figure is sitting by the bedside under the artificial sunlight, so handsome. His face looked older than it should be, I can’t make him suffer.
“I’m sorry too, I just wanted to make sure, that you need me here.” Of course I need you here, I shall hug you now, but it won’t be long, and I’m stinky with the disinfectant fluid.
“I’ll go, got few letters. Love you.” Love you.
The artificial sun lamp is a light source covered with ground glass, I turned it on whenever I need a siesta. The sunshine it creates is hallucinative enough to make me imagine, the midsummer sunshine in La Plata, lying on the backyard grassland. I used to have a ginger cat, I always smelled sunshine from him, the strips fur. Oh my now I start remembering so many things, they’re all good all great, I want to go back but wait, I got bills to pay. Great things come with costs, the better the higher price, no exception. What’s the most expensive thing? Lejanía, a star I’ll never reach, because I stopped mourning Rosa. Jerk Cyano you forgot the most precious thing in this universe, gotta get it back. Just sleep and dream about her and apologise and maybe pray, for the technologies could bring her back one day. Love should be precious but it comes with a great price, even greater to the extent to crumble not just your body, but your mind. Oh Salix I can’t say I love you or I need you because I knew you’re a Runner, and Runners can’t fall in love, there has to be a reason for that rule. Maybe I should check some law books to find out. Why don’t you just ask him? No no no don’t bring up the topic again you shouldn’t torture him. Just leave it to the dream, you’ll figure those out there.
Hum... trouble sleeping? The sunshine is good good perfect, oh is it nostalgia that prevents me from falling asleep? Shut up and give up and get up.
To be honest, I’m super curious about Alice, it sounds like a little girl, but people get older and their name don’t change. I assume she’s a little girl, wait till tomorrow you’ll see. But the curiosity is stronger, I’m walking to that room, my mop walks behind me. This is stupid, please be a good boy when you’re cleaning. Even I tried to slow down the trip, it’s getting closer and closer. When I pass that door carelessly I don’t see anyone, redo the floor, nobody, redo again, back and forth, and in the end I press my face on the square window, nobody. Open the door, but something’s on the way. The door’s locked, should I report it?
My memories were swallowed again, I can’t remember how I got through that door but I’m sure I’ve entered that room this afternoon, and what happened? I feel unreal again, perhaps it’s because now the clock is malfunctioning, how could it go so fast? Ten o’clock, unbelievable, my door hasn’t been knocked since yesterday evening. Where’s Salix, he just said he love me this afternoon, loved me? Maybe my memories about this previous night had been swallowed too?
The room FR44, floor 6. Knock knock knock, hum, knock knock knock, hum, knock knock knock. Joder! This situation reminds me of two nights ago his deer slumber and last night his silence. “Salix! Salix! Salix!” There’re people looking out at me, oh I can’t be his bad reputation, I must hide.
The hurting is temporary, and happy is temporary too, I’m lucky enough for both. Can’t believe I’m losing sleep. Sheep one, sheep two, sheep three, sheep Sunder, sheep Devo, sheep Rosa, sheep... Salix. I don’t know when he entered my room, now he’s leaning against the bathroom glass wall, looking at me intently.
“Salix, where did you go?” His gaze should be creepy now, but I’m not sure, he looked cold and lonely. I get him into the bed, his skin is freezing cold. “Did you go outside? Next time please don’t just wear a shirt, okay?” I know this is like in my dream, I couldn’t seek for his answers. The Gobang papers are in his fist, “do you want to play?” Oh idiot just hold him into you. He must’ve gone through a lot, I really care about him but how to feel another heart? I really need a sleep to get some solutions. When I’m holding him I get some replies from his eyes, they’re pure grey with icy mountains on the irises. His eyes are speaking something like: “I’m lonely, I need love, I want you, I love you, say you’re lonely, say you need love, say you want me, say you love me.” Salix I’m here, I’ll give you anything you want, wait a second.
R800, floor 3. What time is it? Hope he’s awake. Knock knock knock. In a short time, Devo’s at the door.
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