读到安妮故居的段落也很触动，或许和当年跑大老远去看话剧相关。但第12章的结尾实在是不大喜欢，这种情节安排太过小说化了。
第13章Gus吐露了病情的实情，让Hazel第一次认真看待与爱着的人别离的事实。开始意识到自己是“手雷”是多么的荒谬。读着读着突然又不下去，作者的行文太无奈…只能说潮落了要收尾就收尾吧。
Gus motioned down to the shadows of the branches intersecting and coming apart on the concrete. “Beautiful, huh?”
“The negative image of things blown together and then blown apart,” he said. Before us, hundreds of people passed, jogging and biking and Rollerblading. Amsterdam was a city designed for movement and activity, a city that would rather not travel by car, and so inevitably I felt excluded from it. But God, was it beautiful, the creek carving a path around the huge tree, a heron standing still at the water’s edge, searching for a breakfast amid the millions of elm petals floating in the water.
Gus喜欢的隐喻又来了，交叉又分离的疏影其实就是人生的相逢与别离。
配着这段内心真实想法的是阿姆斯特丹这座生机勃勃的城市。景色描写很美。
电子书截图，马斯洛需求理论。
According to Maslow, I was stuck on the second level of the pyramid, unable to feel secure in my health and therefore unable to reach for love and respect and art and whatever else, which is, of course, utter horseshit: The urge to make art or contemplate philosophy does not go away when you are sick. Those urges just become transfigured by illness.
Hazel对这套理论的不认同。其实也在映射这本书作者的观点。个人认为马斯洛只是将需求阶梯化，是一种纯理想的理论模式，提供了一个很好的讨论基础。但人的需求和动机是多样而复杂的，是相互作用互相促进有连续也有断层。
Much of my life had been devoted to trying not to cry in front of people who loved me, so I knew what Augustus was doing. You clench your teeth.You look up. You tell yourself that if they see you cry, it will hurt them, and you will be nothing but A Sadness in their lives, and you must not become a mere sadness, so you will not cry, and you say all of this to yourself while looking up at the ceiling, and then you swallow even though your throat does not want to close and you look at the person who loves you and smile.
Gus告诉Hazel病情时，Hazel的内心让人酸楚。也是真实生活中很多人的表现选择。
读到了第16章，很平淡。这次轮到Gus犯病了，出院后身体大不如以前，只能坐着轮椅。
“Nostalgia is a side effect of cancer,” I told him.
“Nah, nostalgia is a side effect of dying,” he answered. Above us, the wind blew and the branching shadows rearranged themselves on our skin. Gus squeezed my hand. “It is a good life, Hazel Grace.”
Gus说那个秋千不送人就好了，我已经开始怀念我没有坐过的秋千。
Hazel说怀旧是癌症的一种副作用。Gus纠正说是死亡的副作用。
这一段让人心中淡淡哀伤。
第十八章(后面的章节都很短)Gus病情越来越严重，因为想自己买包烟(不抽，只是为了给自己一个隐喻，凡是威胁我的让我坚强)，半夜落难在了加油站。因为胃管出了问题给Hazel求助，不想去医院被当做无用的人。两人之间的互相安慰让人想落泪，或许是夜晚太沉静了。
But this was the truth, a pitiful boy who desperately wanted not to be pitiful, screaming and crying, poisoned by an infected G-tube that kept him alive, but not alive enough.
...
“Read me something,” he said as the goddamned ambulance roared right past us. So while I waited for them to turn around and find us, I recited the only poem I could bring to mind,
“The Red Wheelbarrow” by William Carlos Williams.
so much depends
upon
a red wheel
barrow
glazed with rain
water
beside the white
chickens.
本来想贴上中文译本，版本多达八九种，发现诗歌不难就不贴了。一种童趣语言的断断续续，颜色的跳跃，静与动的结合还挺生动的小诗。美20世纪诗人，象征派意象派，还是一个儿科医生。
There are days, many of them, when I resent the size of my unbounded set. I want more numbers than I’m likely to get, and God, I want more numbers for Augustus Waters than he got. But, Gus, my love, I cannot tell you how thankful I am for our little infinity. I wouldn’t trade it for the world. You gave me a forever within the numbered days, and I’m grateful.
因为时光的稀缺，这份感情更弥足珍贵。某种意义上已是永恒。(Gus的预葬礼上Hazel写的悼词)
...then I realized there was no one else to call, which was the saddest thing. The only person I really wanted to talk to about Augustus Waters’s death was Augustus Waters.
It was unbearable. The whole thing. Every second worse than the last. I just kept thinking about calling him, wondering what would happen, if anyone would answer. In the last weeks, we’d been reduced to spending our time together in recollection, but that was not nothing: The pleasure of remembering had been taken from me, because there was no longer anyone to remember with. It felt like losing your co-rememberer meant losing the memory itself, as if the things we’d done were less real and important than they had been hours before.
在得知Gus离开后的Hazel的反应，这一处让人心碎。
“Omnis cellula e cellula,” he said again. “All cells come from cells. Every cell is born of a previous cell, which was born of a previous cell. Life comes from life. Life begets life begets life begets life begets life.”
Peter Van Houten赴约来参加Gus的葬礼。回去的路上给Hazel小说的解释。生命来自生命，生命产生生命，轮回不止，生生不息。
不更了，连续被锁文(还是以前的文)。不明白到底哪里出错了！！！！
这本书还剩最后10％结束，读完就读完了。实在是难道以后让我只写点风花雪月，感慨人生，挣钱有道，日常琐碎，如何点钻生贝的东西才可以。想不明白！！只是学习内容而已啊！！
这一篇就这样了。
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